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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 329202" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>I'm stuck on the possibility of fetal alcohol spectrum. If his birthmom drank while pregnant, and it sounds like she did, he likely is behaving like he has no conscience because he doesn't...kids with organic brain damage due to alcohol exposure in utero do NOT have a conscience and do NOT learn from their mistakes. And they can't help it. It's biological...a bit like Alzheimers. Often they substance abuse too and don't get that it makes them worse.</p><p></p><p>If you can take him to a neuropsychologist who agrees or thinks he has organic brain damage due to alcohol and drug exposure pre-birth, you could probably get him more help and put in a safe place where he'll be out of the house. It then becomes a physical disability rather than a psychiatric problem, which may be unfairly partly blamed on your and hub. I believe, you get more help with physical disorders.</p><p></p><p>Sadly, fetal alcohol spectrum doesn't get better and can't be cured by any techniques. Short of 24/7 watchdogs, all their lives, many end up in prison because they can't care what they do and don't learn from their mistakes...half the time they don't even remember what the consequences were. If they only have part of the spectrum, they will have normal IQ's but fail in school regardless and their brain damage is as debilitating as if they had the entire syndrome. It's not pretty and the kids are damaged for life.</p><p></p><p>I hope it all works out for you. I agree that he is very dangerous and needs to not only be out of the home, but given a safe place to live away from society. Sadly, often there is little to be done for a child like this. Seems you've tried it all. (((Hugs)))</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 329202, member: 1550"] I'm stuck on the possibility of fetal alcohol spectrum. If his birthmom drank while pregnant, and it sounds like she did, he likely is behaving like he has no conscience because he doesn't...kids with organic brain damage due to alcohol exposure in utero do NOT have a conscience and do NOT learn from their mistakes. And they can't help it. It's biological...a bit like Alzheimers. Often they substance abuse too and don't get that it makes them worse. If you can take him to a neuropsychologist who agrees or thinks he has organic brain damage due to alcohol and drug exposure pre-birth, you could probably get him more help and put in a safe place where he'll be out of the house. It then becomes a physical disability rather than a psychiatric problem, which may be unfairly partly blamed on your and hub. I believe, you get more help with physical disorders. Sadly, fetal alcohol spectrum doesn't get better and can't be cured by any techniques. Short of 24/7 watchdogs, all their lives, many end up in prison because they can't care what they do and don't learn from their mistakes...half the time they don't even remember what the consequences were. If they only have part of the spectrum, they will have normal IQ's but fail in school regardless and their brain damage is as debilitating as if they had the entire syndrome. It's not pretty and the kids are damaged for life. I hope it all works out for you. I agree that he is very dangerous and needs to not only be out of the home, but given a safe place to live away from society. Sadly, often there is little to be done for a child like this. Seems you've tried it all. (((Hugs))) [/QUOTE]
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