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<blockquote data-quote="house of cards" data-source="post: 236059" data-attributes="member: 2005"><p>Thank you for your reply, I am really struggling with this. My son is 24 and he and I have had problems ever since he started spending the night at her house(with her parents) and I told him he was expected to get home, no curfew just at some point in the night. He told me he was 21 (at the time) and moved out 2 months earlier then was planned so he could continue to do what she wanted. </p><p></p><p>I married a controlling man and it has been hard to find enough room to exist with him thru the years, at 1 point I told my son that I thought she was controlling and that it isn't easy to live with that, I did add that maybe it would be different for him because he would have his work as an outlet for just himself where as I was at home full time.. I've had my son visit exactly 1 time since that conversation with out her being with him. She reads his e-mail, is right at the phone often telling him what to say, you get the picture. She is controlling. He lets her. At this point in his life I think he likes it. I know at one point I did. </p><p></p><p>She has a lot of very good qualities as well and I can see his attraction to her, if he is happy and he seems to be very happy with her, I can accept his choice. I said what I needed to say and I have let it go as far as their relationship. I was hurt and sad that he didn't want the kids there as well but I wasn't going to fight about it. I was trying to paint a happy picture for the kids that they got to go to the actual wedding ceremony and a meet and greet right after, I told them it wasn't for kids later. </p><p></p><p>But the twins have been talking non stop about the wedding and wanting to dance and everything, my husband called my son up and told him he wanted the kids to come, that was when I got the e-mail from future d-i-l. I haven't responded to it although my husband has called my son and told him that he wants the oldest 3 to definitely come and the littles if they aren't disruptive, he doesn't think they would have to pay for the littles and someone probably wouldn't show anyway leaving room.</p><p></p><p>So, I've sat on the e-mail for 2 days, Do I need to respond or has my husband handled that? I don't really trust my words/tone to reply.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="house of cards, post: 236059, member: 2005"] Thank you for your reply, I am really struggling with this. My son is 24 and he and I have had problems ever since he started spending the night at her house(with her parents) and I told him he was expected to get home, no curfew just at some point in the night. He told me he was 21 (at the time) and moved out 2 months earlier then was planned so he could continue to do what she wanted. I married a controlling man and it has been hard to find enough room to exist with him thru the years, at 1 point I told my son that I thought she was controlling and that it isn't easy to live with that, I did add that maybe it would be different for him because he would have his work as an outlet for just himself where as I was at home full time.. I've had my son visit exactly 1 time since that conversation with out her being with him. She reads his e-mail, is right at the phone often telling him what to say, you get the picture. She is controlling. He lets her. At this point in his life I think he likes it. I know at one point I did. She has a lot of very good qualities as well and I can see his attraction to her, if he is happy and he seems to be very happy with her, I can accept his choice. I said what I needed to say and I have let it go as far as their relationship. I was hurt and sad that he didn't want the kids there as well but I wasn't going to fight about it. I was trying to paint a happy picture for the kids that they got to go to the actual wedding ceremony and a meet and greet right after, I told them it wasn't for kids later. But the twins have been talking non stop about the wedding and wanting to dance and everything, my husband called my son up and told him he wanted the kids to come, that was when I got the e-mail from future d-i-l. I haven't responded to it although my husband has called my son and told him that he wants the oldest 3 to definitely come and the littles if they aren't disruptive, he doesn't think they would have to pay for the littles and someone probably wouldn't show anyway leaving room. So, I've sat on the e-mail for 2 days, Do I need to respond or has my husband handled that? I don't really trust my words/tone to reply. [/QUOTE]
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