I took my oldest daughter to get cleats for soccer last night. I was so happy and so carefree. I looked over in the seat next to me as we were driving and my 17 year old is crying. I was just stunned and she said she remembers me like this, before difficult child. I put my dog to sleep yesterday, I have had H1N1 and left over affects from having salmonella poisoning, but yet I am so much more relaxed. difficult child has been in the psychiatric hospital. I have had a break, I quit a job, I have worked on cleaning house, I have slept, rested and pampered only me. I played with my other dog. I cannot believe how life can be so relaxing. I am so much more tolerant of people and have more patience since difficult child has been hospitalized. She should be released in a couple of days. I like me today. I don't want to go back to that stressed, nut that I was before. She pushes every button she can. I hope I can maintain some of the peace that I have now. I haven't been thinking of her every minute. SO nice. I am glad to know that I am here somewhere just a little hidden. Has it ever felt like this to anyone ever else. Do youjust go right back to being that nutty person you don't want to be? I do know that every night I do NOT want to go home, but this week I couldn't wait to get off and go home.