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Well I guess he beat me to it
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 744260" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>His ex didnt get him on meth or stop him from quitting when he wanted to.</p><p></p><p>At any point in time he could have left his ex. It didnt require him to even leave Chicago, the area I grew up in. It is a huge place. He could have just left. It wasnt about his ex. He is still using.</p><p></p><p>You, and many of us, want to think our adults have gotten into trouble because of other people. No. They are drawn to people like themselves. They do what they want to do.</p><p></p><p>Your son is not a wuss. He tells you what he wont do all the time and says no to your good ideas. He has no.desire to quit. He knows where to go for help if he wants it and its not Mom's house. Nobody can stop him if he wants to quit. Nobody can make him quit if he won't. Not ex. Not you. Only himself.</p><p></p><p>You will hear from him again. He is a serious drug addict and will get sick and scared and need money again. Who else will he call?</p><p></p><p> The question is, is it good for YOU if he contacts you for these reasons and then assaults you with the verbal vomit of a drug addict? I dont know if the drugs are what makes him act this vile, if he was always this way (he DID assault you young) or if its both himself and the drugs combined. You dont t deserve this Its nonsense.</p><p></p><p>My suggestion.is to limit how often you will talk to him on the phone or read his texts. You need to be well. Tell him to call you once a week at a certain time for ten minutes and that if he is abusesive he will lose that time. Then block him until that time. I did a version.of this to my son and it has been highly affective. I no longer need to limit his time as he watches what he says.</p><p></p><p>I know this hurts but I cant see him actually doing a cut off forever. You will hear from him the moment he wants some sort of help, money, or he is scared. Who else can he call?</p><p></p><p>I personally feel his brain is affected by the meth/heroin combo and that you should disregard anything he says with his sick brain. Have you ever taken, say, Sudafed or anything that made you a little off? Multiply that times 1000.</p><p></p><p>You need to do what you feel you must do. Just remember two things to help you cope. 1. You and nobody else can help him until he wants help.Sincerely. Like rehab, sober living, meetings. 2. His verbal vomit is spoken from a sick brain.</p><p></p><p>Do try to move on with your own life. Your own life is the only life you can control and make better. Are you in therapy? Al Anon? Both? Who helps YOU? Do you have other nice kids, a SO, loving family, loving friends? Dont be afraid to lean on them</p><p> Spend time with nice people doing fun things.</p><p></p><p>Depriving yourself from pleasure wont help your son. I am sorry for all of this. It sucks.</p><p></p><p>Love and light.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 744260, member: 1550"] His ex didnt get him on meth or stop him from quitting when he wanted to. At any point in time he could have left his ex. It didnt require him to even leave Chicago, the area I grew up in. It is a huge place. He could have just left. It wasnt about his ex. He is still using. You, and many of us, want to think our adults have gotten into trouble because of other people. No. They are drawn to people like themselves. They do what they want to do. Your son is not a wuss. He tells you what he wont do all the time and says no to your good ideas. He has no.desire to quit. He knows where to go for help if he wants it and its not Mom's house. Nobody can stop him if he wants to quit. Nobody can make him quit if he won't. Not ex. Not you. Only himself. You will hear from him again. He is a serious drug addict and will get sick and scared and need money again. Who else will he call? The question is, is it good for YOU if he contacts you for these reasons and then assaults you with the verbal vomit of a drug addict? I dont know if the drugs are what makes him act this vile, if he was always this way (he DID assault you young) or if its both himself and the drugs combined. You dont t deserve this Its nonsense. My suggestion.is to limit how often you will talk to him on the phone or read his texts. You need to be well. Tell him to call you once a week at a certain time for ten minutes and that if he is abusesive he will lose that time. Then block him until that time. I did a version.of this to my son and it has been highly affective. I no longer need to limit his time as he watches what he says. I know this hurts but I cant see him actually doing a cut off forever. You will hear from him the moment he wants some sort of help, money, or he is scared. Who else can he call? I personally feel his brain is affected by the meth/heroin combo and that you should disregard anything he says with his sick brain. Have you ever taken, say, Sudafed or anything that made you a little off? Multiply that times 1000. You need to do what you feel you must do. Just remember two things to help you cope. 1. You and nobody else can help him until he wants help.Sincerely. Like rehab, sober living, meetings. 2. His verbal vomit is spoken from a sick brain. Do try to move on with your own life. Your own life is the only life you can control and make better. Are you in therapy? Al Anon? Both? Who helps YOU? Do you have other nice kids, a SO, loving family, loving friends? Dont be afraid to lean on them Spend time with nice people doing fun things. Depriving yourself from pleasure wont help your son. I am sorry for all of this. It sucks. Love and light. [/QUOTE]
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Well I guess he beat me to it
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