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Well I guess he beat me to it
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<blockquote data-quote="LauraH" data-source="post: 744309" data-attributes="member: 22877"><p>Absolutely. I don't know if he was calling for further recriminations, to apologize, to ask for something...and he rarely leaves voicemails, today being no exception, so I will probably never know what exactly he wanted. I will not take his calls while I am still processing this latest blow to my heart. I honestly don't know what I will do if he shows up at my door before I am ready to speak with him. Close the door in his face seems cold but until I have fully come to grips with what may be my new normal, I don't want to have a conversation with him via any media on any topic. Maybe step outside and risk getting sucked into an exchange with him that I am not ready or equipped to do. Maybe just not open the door at all and tell I'm call him when I'm ready to talk. No idea...I guess I won't know what my reaction will be until that time comes.</p><p></p><p>My phone rang a few minutes ago and I almost didn't even pick it up, fearing in my gut it was my son. Luckily I did, though, because it was sister-in=calling to update me on my husband's nephew's condition, who recently had a seizure that resulted in a fall in which he broke his back. Honestly it was a relief to be able to focus on someone else's issues instead of my own for a brief period. </p><p></p><p>Oh hey, also, when the folks who pray say your nightly prayers, please say a quick one for a dear high school friend of mine. His wife is in the final stages of alzheimer's and just today Hospice was over for an evaluation. Fortunately she will be getting in-home care at least for the time being but my friend is beside himself. I had reached out to him this morning because something put him in my heart and mind, and that's when he told me this latest development. He said Laura I thought I was prepared for this day but I am not at all, I am a basket case. Of course we are never fully prepared for this kind of loss no matter how much we think we are. So just remember that family in your thoughts and prayers please.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="LauraH, post: 744309, member: 22877"] Absolutely. I don't know if he was calling for further recriminations, to apologize, to ask for something...and he rarely leaves voicemails, today being no exception, so I will probably never know what exactly he wanted. I will not take his calls while I am still processing this latest blow to my heart. I honestly don't know what I will do if he shows up at my door before I am ready to speak with him. Close the door in his face seems cold but until I have fully come to grips with what may be my new normal, I don't want to have a conversation with him via any media on any topic. Maybe step outside and risk getting sucked into an exchange with him that I am not ready or equipped to do. Maybe just not open the door at all and tell I'm call him when I'm ready to talk. No idea...I guess I won't know what my reaction will be until that time comes. My phone rang a few minutes ago and I almost didn't even pick it up, fearing in my gut it was my son. Luckily I did, though, because it was sister-in=calling to update me on my husband's nephew's condition, who recently had a seizure that resulted in a fall in which he broke his back. Honestly it was a relief to be able to focus on someone else's issues instead of my own for a brief period. Oh hey, also, when the folks who pray say your nightly prayers, please say a quick one for a dear high school friend of mine. His wife is in the final stages of alzheimer's and just today Hospice was over for an evaluation. Fortunately she will be getting in-home care at least for the time being but my friend is beside himself. I had reached out to him this morning because something put him in my heart and mind, and that's when he told me this latest development. He said Laura I thought I was prepared for this day but I am not at all, I am a basket case. Of course we are never fully prepared for this kind of loss no matter how much we think we are. So just remember that family in your thoughts and prayers please. [/QUOTE]
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