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General Parenting
Well now a different approach....
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<blockquote data-quote="slsh" data-source="post: 97972" data-attributes="member: 8"><p>Beth - sending you a gentle hug. I know it's hard to back off and wait for your kid make some kind of an effort. We've done this to varying degrees over the years (much more so now) and I think it's a very logical thing to do. If all it took for our kids to learn how to live with their mental illness was our own motivation and participation, none of us would need to be here. Our kids have *got* to get invested in their own treatment.</p><p></p><p>I cannot imagine how difficult it is to juggle visits to 2 kids in different RTCs. I know that after the first couple of years of visiting thank you at RTCs, I started to resent the disruption of our family life to schlep however many hours up to whichever Residential Treatment Center (RTC) he was in, especially since *he* wasn't doing a doggone thing to change the situation. </p><p></p><p>If you find it hard to back off completely, or if your son turns out to be impressively stubborn when it comes to stepping up, I also think it's perfectly reasonable to visit on your own timetable, when *you* need to as opposed to when he wants you to. Might be something to think about down the road, if this gets to be drawn out. </p><p></p><p>Sorry you guys are having to go through this. Kudos to you and your hubby for sticking together on the treatment plan!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="slsh, post: 97972, member: 8"] Beth - sending you a gentle hug. I know it's hard to back off and wait for your kid make some kind of an effort. We've done this to varying degrees over the years (much more so now) and I think it's a very logical thing to do. If all it took for our kids to learn how to live with their mental illness was our own motivation and participation, none of us would need to be here. Our kids have *got* to get invested in their own treatment. I cannot imagine how difficult it is to juggle visits to 2 kids in different RTCs. I know that after the first couple of years of visiting thank you at RTCs, I started to resent the disruption of our family life to schlep however many hours up to whichever Residential Treatment Center (RTC) he was in, especially since *he* wasn't doing a doggone thing to change the situation. If you find it hard to back off completely, or if your son turns out to be impressively stubborn when it comes to stepping up, I also think it's perfectly reasonable to visit on your own timetable, when *you* need to as opposed to when he wants you to. Might be something to think about down the road, if this gets to be drawn out. Sorry you guys are having to go through this. Kudos to you and your hubby for sticking together on the treatment plan! [/QUOTE]
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