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Well, that settles that!
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<blockquote data-quote="Nancy" data-source="post: 470675" data-attributes="member: 59"><p>Kathy, this is so much like what difficult child did. After release from rehab she went "back out" which is their term for relapse and then went to live with a guy down the street when we kicked her out. That lasted three months. During that time her rehab counselor tried to get her into a sober house and she had every excuse in the book with the biggest one being that she didn't want to lose her job. She ended up losing her job when she couldn't get to work because of using and ended up working in a strip club. The walls finally came crashing down and she wanted to come home. We said no but that we would support her going to a sober house and that was all. </p><p></p><p>Like TL said, be clear in what you will and will not support. I know this is very upsetting and you feel like the month treatment was a waste, it wasn't. Even if it seems that way, she learned things in there that she will use when she finally decides to get serious about recovery. In the meantime you will have to wait, and it will be an agonizing wait. Keep busy and remember she is choosing to live her life this way and you are choosing to live your life differently. The loser boyfriend will eventually go away. The hardest thing is for us to wait on the sidelines and find some way to detach enough so that our lives still have joy and happiness.</p><p></p><p>You know we are all pulling for you and praying that your difficult child finally gets to where she wants to change.</p><p></p><p>Hugs,</p><p>Nancy</p><p></p><p>P.S. The one thing we never stopped paying for was her cellphone. I threatened many times to stop but in the end it was our only means of communication and I wanted her to be able to get in touch with us if she needed.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Nancy, post: 470675, member: 59"] Kathy, this is so much like what difficult child did. After release from rehab she went "back out" which is their term for relapse and then went to live with a guy down the street when we kicked her out. That lasted three months. During that time her rehab counselor tried to get her into a sober house and she had every excuse in the book with the biggest one being that she didn't want to lose her job. She ended up losing her job when she couldn't get to work because of using and ended up working in a strip club. The walls finally came crashing down and she wanted to come home. We said no but that we would support her going to a sober house and that was all. Like TL said, be clear in what you will and will not support. I know this is very upsetting and you feel like the month treatment was a waste, it wasn't. Even if it seems that way, she learned things in there that she will use when she finally decides to get serious about recovery. In the meantime you will have to wait, and it will be an agonizing wait. Keep busy and remember she is choosing to live her life this way and you are choosing to live your life differently. The loser boyfriend will eventually go away. The hardest thing is for us to wait on the sidelines and find some way to detach enough so that our lives still have joy and happiness. You know we are all pulling for you and praying that your difficult child finally gets to where she wants to change. Hugs, Nancy P.S. The one thing we never stopped paying for was her cellphone. I threatened many times to stop but in the end it was our only means of communication and I wanted her to be able to get in touch with us if she needed. [/QUOTE]
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