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Parent Emeritus
Well, this hasnt happened for a while. Stunned.
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 692927" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>thanks, Cedar.</p><p></p><p>He doesnt throw temper tantrums. He ruminates over worst case scenarios nonstop and gets into chronic panic that affects him physically and emotionally. I spoke to him often this week and weekend and he knew about my plans and asked me to change them. I firmly said he csn call me before I go or after, but that I am going.</p><p></p><p>There is not much I wont do for my adult kids if they ask politely, but this request was not doable. It was our Fathers Day and it was supposed to be on Saturday, which Bart was okay with (thanks for the permission...lol). But then Jumpers schedule got changed and we decided to do it on her only day off.</p><p></p><p>Look, he isnt sixteen and it isn't my fault he married who he married. I have been his main support for two years. His way of dealing with stress is to talk non stop. He needs a therapist badly for his anxiety. He did GREAT when he was seeing one. But, he claims, he makes too much for low cost clinics. The psycologists (he will not see anyone who has less education than PhD) really don't cater to after work patients, and he has already taken off more than he should for court and his insurance has a high deductable.</p><p></p><p>That leaves me. He doesnt have a group of man friends. His girlfriend often works weekends (which makes him angry) and he wont do to any type of group. Like the recovering d c he is, he still shares many traits with all the adult kids here. He cant, he won't, he cant, he won't.</p><p></p><p>I have a busy life and lots of family peeps. I try to accomodate him and make time, but I cant always put him first. I can just imagine this:</p><p></p><p>"Husband dear, we cant do fathers day as planned because I have to stay home in case Bart wants to talk to me about his court case tomorrow."</p><p></p><p>My husband isn't a big Bart fan as it is because he knows he can be disrespectful. Sonic and Jumper, the others involved, consider him like Gone boy. He never tried to know them and was out if the house by the time they were in school.</p><p></p><p>He IS a good father and I hope he hears what he wants to hear today in court. id actually BE there if he hadnt high tailed off to Missouri. I told him I'd be lucky to see him once a year if he went there. its hard to get there from mid Wisconsin by train or bus, requires tranfers and getting in at 12am.bAfter my accounts dent I wont drugs ve twelve hours plus I have a challenging sense of direction.</p><p></p><p>Thanks for responding. This was more a vent than anything else.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 692927, member: 1550"] thanks, Cedar. He doesnt throw temper tantrums. He ruminates over worst case scenarios nonstop and gets into chronic panic that affects him physically and emotionally. I spoke to him often this week and weekend and he knew about my plans and asked me to change them. I firmly said he csn call me before I go or after, but that I am going. There is not much I wont do for my adult kids if they ask politely, but this request was not doable. It was our Fathers Day and it was supposed to be on Saturday, which Bart was okay with (thanks for the permission...lol). But then Jumpers schedule got changed and we decided to do it on her only day off. Look, he isnt sixteen and it isn't my fault he married who he married. I have been his main support for two years. His way of dealing with stress is to talk non stop. He needs a therapist badly for his anxiety. He did GREAT when he was seeing one. But, he claims, he makes too much for low cost clinics. The psycologists (he will not see anyone who has less education than PhD) really don't cater to after work patients, and he has already taken off more than he should for court and his insurance has a high deductable. That leaves me. He doesnt have a group of man friends. His girlfriend often works weekends (which makes him angry) and he wont do to any type of group. Like the recovering d c he is, he still shares many traits with all the adult kids here. He cant, he won't, he cant, he won't. I have a busy life and lots of family peeps. I try to accomodate him and make time, but I cant always put him first. I can just imagine this: "Husband dear, we cant do fathers day as planned because I have to stay home in case Bart wants to talk to me about his court case tomorrow." My husband isn't a big Bart fan as it is because he knows he can be disrespectful. Sonic and Jumper, the others involved, consider him like Gone boy. He never tried to know them and was out if the house by the time they were in school. He IS a good father and I hope he hears what he wants to hear today in court. id actually BE there if he hadnt high tailed off to Missouri. I told him I'd be lucky to see him once a year if he went there. its hard to get there from mid Wisconsin by train or bus, requires tranfers and getting in at 12am.bAfter my accounts dent I wont drugs ve twelve hours plus I have a challenging sense of direction. Thanks for responding. This was more a vent than anything else. [/QUOTE]
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Well, this hasnt happened for a while. Stunned.
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