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General Parenting
What do you do when difficult child is pushing your buttons?
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<blockquote data-quote="tryinghard" data-source="post: 148378" data-attributes="member: 4570"><p>One Day,</p><p> </p><p>Thank you for sharing. Your words did bring me comfort. </p><p> </p><p>I am so scared to let him try and do it on his own..because...he won't. School is so overwhelming for him now..if he sees no positives I am afraid it will get worse and he will completely shut down.</p><p> </p><p>He has an IEP but honestly I have never felt the teachers or anyone at the school care. My son appears "normal" so they all believe he is just being lazy and can do it if he wants. I asked him last night what he thought about school. He said he did not like it. I asked why and he said, "Most of the time I do not understand what the teacher teaching. I forgot so much it is hard".</p><p> </p><p>So, that means that I (and the tutor) end up teaching him "one on one" the concepts of the day in almost every class. He is frustrated and so are we.</p><p> </p><p>So my fear is if I stop...he will not learn and thing and will fail.</p><p> </p><p>Yes I have brought this up to the school..they just give me a blank stare and tell me that he is lazy and he wants to have to do the work and learn. I tell them that of course if it is hard he struggles and doesn't want to try. Poor kid..every day he sits in the class and struggles for six hours. Who would want to do that!</p><p> </p><p>I do not know..I am afraid that without an instruction manual for him (gosh I wish he came with one) I do not know what I am doing wrong and what I am doing right.</p><p> </p><p>I guess I feel that if I give 1000% to him and he fails..I least I can look myself in the mirror and say I did my best. If I do not give 1000% and he fails...I will feel guilt for the rest of my life.</p><p> </p><p>My stepsons mom did not help him very much. She felt it was his responsiblity. He is now 26 and struggles to find a job and function because of his lack of learning. He has learning disabilities too. I could not live with myself if my son is like this and i did not feel I did everything I could to help. </p><p> </p><p>Does this make sense to anyone else...or I am just taking this too far?</p><p> </p><p>I am sorry to go on and on..but I only feel that the people on this board understand. No one else does...</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="tryinghard, post: 148378, member: 4570"] One Day, Thank you for sharing. Your words did bring me comfort. I am so scared to let him try and do it on his own..because...he won't. School is so overwhelming for him now..if he sees no positives I am afraid it will get worse and he will completely shut down. He has an IEP but honestly I have never felt the teachers or anyone at the school care. My son appears "normal" so they all believe he is just being lazy and can do it if he wants. I asked him last night what he thought about school. He said he did not like it. I asked why and he said, "Most of the time I do not understand what the teacher teaching. I forgot so much it is hard". So, that means that I (and the tutor) end up teaching him "one on one" the concepts of the day in almost every class. He is frustrated and so are we. So my fear is if I stop...he will not learn and thing and will fail. Yes I have brought this up to the school..they just give me a blank stare and tell me that he is lazy and he wants to have to do the work and learn. I tell them that of course if it is hard he struggles and doesn't want to try. Poor kid..every day he sits in the class and struggles for six hours. Who would want to do that! I do not know..I am afraid that without an instruction manual for him (gosh I wish he came with one) I do not know what I am doing wrong and what I am doing right. I guess I feel that if I give 1000% to him and he fails..I least I can look myself in the mirror and say I did my best. If I do not give 1000% and he fails...I will feel guilt for the rest of my life. My stepsons mom did not help him very much. She felt it was his responsiblity. He is now 26 and struggles to find a job and function because of his lack of learning. He has learning disabilities too. I could not live with myself if my son is like this and i did not feel I did everything I could to help. Does this make sense to anyone else...or I am just taking this too far? I am sorry to go on and on..but I only feel that the people on this board understand. No one else does... [/QUOTE]
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