Trying Hard,
I hear you, and understand your concerns. It sounds like our difficult children differ in that our difficult child picked and chose what he wanted ,and did not want to do. It sounds like your difficult child truly wants to do it all, but is frustrated in his efforts. In that case, it really sounds like the school is not meeting his needs . Has the school system conducted an evaluation of difficult child? Does he have any learning disabilities?
If they haven't done this, that needs to be at the head of the list for the next school year. He may need to be moved into different classes with a different teaching style. difficult child needs to be able to perform his work as independently as possible.
Our difficult child has encountered that same observation by school personnel - he looks "normal" and on a good day he is quite "with it" - so he must just be lazy... We had the school evaluation completed but it was not adequate - so we dug deep and purchased our own. It has made a big difference for difficult child.
I hope that you can get the sd to cooperate with you, it definitely takes persistence...
