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<blockquote data-quote="recoveringenabler" data-source="post: 724054" data-attributes="member: 13542"><p>Traumatic Brain Injury (TBI), you've been thru a tsunami of devastating events, anyone in your shoes would feel as you do. Your responses are normal. You've been depleted from the intensity of the onslaught of an emotional hurricane, it is essential that you take care of yourself now. While your daughter is in jail, I strongly encourage you to start building your strength back......every day do nurturing and kind things for yourself. Reach out to your friends and your support system. Going to therapy is an excellent choice.</p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p>This is a fairly common experience for us parents, often we are so intensely focused on our difficult children's issues for so long we have forgotten how to take care of ourselves. We have to relearn how to nourish ourselves. Begin to focus your attention on yourself and what it is that you need, what makes you happy, what brings you peace. You have to fill yourself up now.</p><p></p><p>Another option you might consider is NAMI, the National Alliance on Mental Illness. (I can't recall if we've discussed NAMI or not) They have chapters in most cities and can be accessed on line. Many of us here have taken their parent courses which can offer you guidance, information, support and resources. If it feels right, give them a call.</p><p></p><p>What I had to do when my daughter went off the rails was to prioritize my own needs, to put myself in as many supportive environments as I could, to re-learn how to have compassion for myself, to be very kind to myself, to learn how to accept what I can't change and to stay planted in the present moment as opposed to rummaging thru the past or tripping into the future. </p><p></p><p>Books by Pema Chodron helped me. She teaches how to live in uncertainty and chaos. </p><p></p><p>You're in a crummy place right now, your daughter's choices have been catastrophic and they've dragged you down the rabbit hole.......now it's time for you to pull yourself back out and begin to thrive. </p><p></p><p>Make yourself the priority now, one step at a time, every single day, choose YOU. You matter, you deserve a life of peace and joy. Keep posting, it helps. You're not alone. We understand how you feel.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="recoveringenabler, post: 724054, member: 13542"] Traumatic Brain Injury (TBI), you've been thru a tsunami of devastating events, anyone in your shoes would feel as you do. Your responses are normal. You've been depleted from the intensity of the onslaught of an emotional hurricane, it is essential that you take care of yourself now. While your daughter is in jail, I strongly encourage you to start building your strength back......every day do nurturing and kind things for yourself. Reach out to your friends and your support system. Going to therapy is an excellent choice. This is a fairly common experience for us parents, often we are so intensely focused on our difficult children's issues for so long we have forgotten how to take care of ourselves. We have to relearn how to nourish ourselves. Begin to focus your attention on yourself and what it is that you need, what makes you happy, what brings you peace. You have to fill yourself up now. Another option you might consider is NAMI, the National Alliance on Mental Illness. (I can't recall if we've discussed NAMI or not) They have chapters in most cities and can be accessed on line. Many of us here have taken their parent courses which can offer you guidance, information, support and resources. If it feels right, give them a call. What I had to do when my daughter went off the rails was to prioritize my own needs, to put myself in as many supportive environments as I could, to re-learn how to have compassion for myself, to be very kind to myself, to learn how to accept what I can't change and to stay planted in the present moment as opposed to rummaging thru the past or tripping into the future. Books by Pema Chodron helped me. She teaches how to live in uncertainty and chaos. You're in a crummy place right now, your daughter's choices have been catastrophic and they've dragged you down the rabbit hole.......now it's time for you to pull yourself back out and begin to thrive. Make yourself the priority now, one step at a time, every single day, choose YOU. You matter, you deserve a life of peace and joy. Keep posting, it helps. You're not alone. We understand how you feel. [/QUOTE]
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