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What done means/meant to you?
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<blockquote data-quote="Hound dog" data-source="post: 129987" data-attributes="member: 84"><p>Done was when step-difficult child knowingly took two babies, Kayla was just 2 and Alex 1, to live on the streets because she and low life boyfriend double crossed a group of major meth dealers and were being hunted. (literally) </p><p> </p><p>All it would've taken was a phone to either myself or her bio Mom and she <strong>knew </strong>beyond a shadow of a doubt those babies would've had somewhere safe to stay where they were loved. Instead she chose to take them with her because she'd discovered that they were wonderful pawns with emotional blackmail.</p><p> </p><p>I made 2 phone calls. First to cps in Mo to warn them she'd be living on the streets with the kids, with the make, modle, and license plate # of the car. The second was to Bio-Mom she was headed her way, just as I'd predicted.</p><p> </p><p>When I say <strong>done</strong>, I mean totally and completely. No phone calls, no letters, nothing. It's beyond the disowned thing my mother ever did. More of a "you're dead to me".</p><p> </p><p>Knowingly placing two innocent children on the streets (no food, clothes, shelter) and keeping them in a situation that you know is putting their lives in mortal danger, among the many other things........ Well, I can/have forgiven ALOT over the years. But this I don't think I ever can. It's one thing to do this to yourself, quite another to do it to a child.</p><p> </p><p>And even so, it's the hardest thing I've done in my life. Being done didn't stop the worrying, or the wondering. For years the grief was almost too much to stand. There are still days that I feel an overwhelming <strong>need</strong> to find them, to <strong>know</strong>. And then the grief is there all fresh again.</p><p> </p><p>What I do on those days is remind myself of what living through stepgfg's emotional blackmail costs us emotionally, physically, and mentally, not to mention finanacially. easy child would like to hunt her sister down, and not for a happy reunion. And Nichole was devistated, her major downward spiral began shortly after stepgfg disappeared.</p><p> </p><p>Will there ever be forgiveness in the future?</p><p> </p><p>I dunno. Living with difficult child's has taught me to never say "never". Because I "never" dreamed I'd ever have to say I was <strong>done</strong> with one of my kids in the first place.</p><p> </p><p>For me, when I reached that point, I was just there. I knew that was it, and there would be no more. I don't exactly know how to put it into words, but that's how it was. There was no question, no doubt.</p><p> </p><p>I hope they can find a place for Dude before you feel you have to make such a decision.</p><p> </p><p>((hugs))</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Hound dog, post: 129987, member: 84"] Done was when step-difficult child knowingly took two babies, Kayla was just 2 and Alex 1, to live on the streets because she and low life boyfriend double crossed a group of major meth dealers and were being hunted. (literally) All it would've taken was a phone to either myself or her bio Mom and she [B]knew [/B]beyond a shadow of a doubt those babies would've had somewhere safe to stay where they were loved. Instead she chose to take them with her because she'd discovered that they were wonderful pawns with emotional blackmail. I made 2 phone calls. First to cps in Mo to warn them she'd be living on the streets with the kids, with the make, modle, and license plate # of the car. The second was to Bio-Mom she was headed her way, just as I'd predicted. When I say [B]done[/B], I mean totally and completely. No phone calls, no letters, nothing. It's beyond the disowned thing my mother ever did. More of a "you're dead to me". Knowingly placing two innocent children on the streets (no food, clothes, shelter) and keeping them in a situation that you know is putting their lives in mortal danger, among the many other things........ Well, I can/have forgiven ALOT over the years. But this I don't think I ever can. It's one thing to do this to yourself, quite another to do it to a child. And even so, it's the hardest thing I've done in my life. Being done didn't stop the worrying, or the wondering. For years the grief was almost too much to stand. There are still days that I feel an overwhelming [B]need[/B] to find them, to [B]know[/B]. And then the grief is there all fresh again. What I do on those days is remind myself of what living through stepgfg's emotional blackmail costs us emotionally, physically, and mentally, not to mention finanacially. easy child would like to hunt her sister down, and not for a happy reunion. And Nichole was devistated, her major downward spiral began shortly after stepgfg disappeared. Will there ever be forgiveness in the future? I dunno. Living with difficult child's has taught me to never say "never". Because I "never" dreamed I'd ever have to say I was [B]done[/B] with one of my kids in the first place. For me, when I reached that point, I was just there. I knew that was it, and there would be no more. I don't exactly know how to put it into words, but that's how it was. There was no question, no doubt. I hope they can find a place for Dude before you feel you have to make such a decision. ((hugs)) [/QUOTE]
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