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What?!?!? Stupid State / County People...
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<blockquote data-quote="exhausted" data-source="post: 505482" data-attributes="member: 11001"><p>DF,</p><p>What exactly was this meeting scheduled to accomplish? I have been drowning in my own busy schedule and I may have missed some posts. Are they still playing the blame game? At what point do we look for very real solutions or at least support to move forward. How aware are they of Borderline Personality and it's difficulties? What is their training? Have you had any luck with showing them that DBT is about the best and only option to making real changes? How will they follow up with the schools to "demand" more in terms of expectations? Why does this matter so much to them? In my experience (difficult child with borderline traits and also gifted),more pressure equals melt downs, innability to stabalize, and hospitalizations. The prognosis is not good if her emotional health is not stabalized and you do not get support.</p><p></p><p>I don't think the much of the MH community realizes what a hard road it is with Borderline kids. There is respit for those with autism and other developemental or severe psychiatric. disorders. There is nothing for us with borderline as a diagnosis for our kids (and most don't even get the diagnosis, just "traits")-this despite its severity and resistance to treatment.</p><p></p><p>I agree that you should not go alone. I agree that you should record-Suzie star gave me the same advise. I chose to disclose that I was recording. I don't care that it may have changed things because my goal was to help my daughter. I didn't want to end up in court. I knew the meeting would go to all kinds of places without this safeguard. I also took our family therapist who ended up directing the meetings as noone ever could keep them on track. They were not accusing me and husband of any wrong doings at this point just avoiding responsibility and follow through. I used the recording and notes to hold them accoutable. I'm not sure what you should do if they are making accusations. I do know that borderline kids often blame others and will stop at nothing including very scary accusations. Our daughter once told a doctor that a bruise she had was caused by her brother-of course DCFS was on the phone. Of course nothing came of it, but it was so traumatizing for my son and us. I have read this in almost all Borderline (BPD) books-find this and bring this to educate them so they know that your difficult children perceptions are saddly warped by her mental illness.</p><p></p><p>I don't know your situation, but is there a way to get a decent private psychiatrist? One who knows teens and this disorder? I just dont see any help from these state/county people. I see them making things worse and you suffering all the time. Is this worth it? Can you pull out and seek help from a nonprofit(United Way??) or church? I am thinking of you and hoping for the best. (((Hugs)))</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="exhausted, post: 505482, member: 11001"] DF, What exactly was this meeting scheduled to accomplish? I have been drowning in my own busy schedule and I may have missed some posts. Are they still playing the blame game? At what point do we look for very real solutions or at least support to move forward. How aware are they of Borderline Personality and it's difficulties? What is their training? Have you had any luck with showing them that DBT is about the best and only option to making real changes? How will they follow up with the schools to "demand" more in terms of expectations? Why does this matter so much to them? In my experience (difficult child with borderline traits and also gifted),more pressure equals melt downs, innability to stabalize, and hospitalizations. The prognosis is not good if her emotional health is not stabalized and you do not get support. I don't think the much of the MH community realizes what a hard road it is with Borderline kids. There is respit for those with autism and other developemental or severe psychiatric. disorders. There is nothing for us with borderline as a diagnosis for our kids (and most don't even get the diagnosis, just "traits")-this despite its severity and resistance to treatment. I agree that you should not go alone. I agree that you should record-Suzie star gave me the same advise. I chose to disclose that I was recording. I don't care that it may have changed things because my goal was to help my daughter. I didn't want to end up in court. I knew the meeting would go to all kinds of places without this safeguard. I also took our family therapist who ended up directing the meetings as noone ever could keep them on track. They were not accusing me and husband of any wrong doings at this point just avoiding responsibility and follow through. I used the recording and notes to hold them accoutable. I'm not sure what you should do if they are making accusations. I do know that borderline kids often blame others and will stop at nothing including very scary accusations. Our daughter once told a doctor that a bruise she had was caused by her brother-of course DCFS was on the phone. Of course nothing came of it, but it was so traumatizing for my son and us. I have read this in almost all Borderline (BPD) books-find this and bring this to educate them so they know that your difficult children perceptions are saddly warped by her mental illness. I don't know your situation, but is there a way to get a decent private psychiatrist? One who knows teens and this disorder? I just dont see any help from these state/county people. I see them making things worse and you suffering all the time. Is this worth it? Can you pull out and seek help from a nonprofit(United Way??) or church? I am thinking of you and hoping for the best. (((Hugs))) [/QUOTE]
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