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I guess I am having flash backs and I am very glad that I have this forum to let it all out, instead of holding it inside.  I just wish someone other than myself can truly witness the rages that I have seen. Just watching it, never mind being the the person she took it out on, leaves a lot of trauma.  I need to keep re-reading all of your words in this post to fight off the trauma. I am going to get up and brush this off now. I love all of you guys and thank you so much for being here with me and guiding me.