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What was your most difficult boundary to set AND enforce?
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<blockquote data-quote="dashcat" data-source="post: 366329" data-attributes="member: 9175"><p>Like Mom2, my toughest boundary was the one I set on myself. My difficult child does almost everything underground. Her behavior with guys is very unsettling and she especially enjoys "secret" relationships. She thrives on the drama and the secrecy. When she was in high school, there were several situations where I stepped in and told her she couldn't see/talk to one guy or another. This was either related to her grades or to the fact that she'd lied about the guy. All this did was cause more drama and it never stopped the behavior. When she started last summer with an online relationship with a guy she'd be meeting when she went off to college (they met on the college facebook - he lived in TX, we are in Ohio and the school is in Virginia), I said my peace (I'd seen some very inappropriate stuff on my monitoring software), disabled the monitoring software in front of her (I'd warned her it was installed), and told her she was eighteen and clearly choosing her path. She was taught self respect and was not following that path, but I loved her and from now on, I was staying out of it. I did. When she took off with a guy she met online, I told her she could either come home or be completely on her own financially. She chose to come home and continued to be in contact with him. I kept my mouth shut about the guy. He is now out of the picture and she is juggling a couple of guys from God only knows where online. My mouth is firmly closed. It is very difficult but I have come to accept that it is out of my control. I do draw the line at her inviting anyone she's met online here and she knows it. If she breaks that rule, she will be moving to her dad's.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="dashcat, post: 366329, member: 9175"] Like Mom2, my toughest boundary was the one I set on myself. My difficult child does almost everything underground. Her behavior with guys is very unsettling and she especially enjoys "secret" relationships. She thrives on the drama and the secrecy. When she was in high school, there were several situations where I stepped in and told her she couldn't see/talk to one guy or another. This was either related to her grades or to the fact that she'd lied about the guy. All this did was cause more drama and it never stopped the behavior. When she started last summer with an online relationship with a guy she'd be meeting when she went off to college (they met on the college facebook - he lived in TX, we are in Ohio and the school is in Virginia), I said my peace (I'd seen some very inappropriate stuff on my monitoring software), disabled the monitoring software in front of her (I'd warned her it was installed), and told her she was eighteen and clearly choosing her path. She was taught self respect and was not following that path, but I loved her and from now on, I was staying out of it. I did. When she took off with a guy she met online, I told her she could either come home or be completely on her own financially. She chose to come home and continued to be in contact with him. I kept my mouth shut about the guy. He is now out of the picture and she is juggling a couple of guys from God only knows where online. My mouth is firmly closed. It is very difficult but I have come to accept that it is out of my control. I do draw the line at her inviting anyone she's met online here and she knows it. If she breaks that rule, she will be moving to her dad's. [/QUOTE]
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What was your most difficult boundary to set AND enforce?
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