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<blockquote data-quote="ScentofCedar" data-source="post: 98495" data-attributes="member: 3353"><p>This was so clearly stated, Golden.</p><p></p><p>I never could understand how the control piece fit in ~ though that is what I was told, again and again. That I was either controlling or worse yet, manipulative.</p><p></p><p>But it didn't feel that way.</p><p></p><p>I felt that all things were absolutely OUT of control ~ and that nothing made any sense, in the typical cause and effect way life usually works.</p><p></p><p>I just wanted everyone to be happy and healthy.</p><p></p><p>The down side to that is that I was outraged (without admitting it, or ever letting myself acknowledge it) that those I loved were messing up everything I had worked so hard to achieve.</p><p></p><p>Your posting fills in an important missing piece for me, Golden.</p><p></p><p>I will have to think about this very much.</p><p></p><p>It is as if you are standing at the other end of a long, dark forest, holding a lantern so I will know which direction is the way out of the forest.</p><p></p><p>I'm so glad you posted as you did.</p><p></p><p>I still harbor so much resentment, and am still so often ashamed of the way everything has worked out.</p><p></p><p>I have never been able to see it this way before.</p><p></p><p>Barbara</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="ScentofCedar, post: 98495, member: 3353"] This was so clearly stated, Golden. I never could understand how the control piece fit in ~ though that is what I was told, again and again. That I was either controlling or worse yet, manipulative. But it didn't feel that way. I felt that all things were absolutely OUT of control ~ and that nothing made any sense, in the typical cause and effect way life usually works. I just wanted everyone to be happy and healthy. The down side to that is that I was outraged (without admitting it, or ever letting myself acknowledge it) that those I loved were messing up everything I had worked so hard to achieve. Your posting fills in an important missing piece for me, Golden. I will have to think about this very much. It is as if you are standing at the other end of a long, dark forest, holding a lantern so I will know which direction is the way out of the forest. I'm so glad you posted as you did. I still harbor so much resentment, and am still so often ashamed of the way everything has worked out. I have never been able to see it this way before. Barbara [/QUOTE]
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