Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
General Discussions
The Watercooler
What would YOU do???
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="Star*" data-source="post: 102380" data-attributes="member: 4964"><p>Do me a favor - </p><p></p><p>Make me a list of "WHY you stay" in a relationship like that. </p><p></p><p>Out of that list I bet there are a bunch of us that can/will tell you what is a valid reason and what is a myth. </p><p></p><p>Then ask him WHY HE stays - if his list starts out with "Because I love you." Tell him LOVE is giving someone the ability to hurt you but choosing not to do so." By not helping with the children, the house, the canceled therapy appointments - he's not being much of a friend. He's not behaving like a husband should, and he's certainly not being a good example to your children. </p><p></p><p>True - we haven't heard his side of this, only yours. However - try looking at YOUR life for a minute. How old are you? How long do you 'think' you'll live to. Is your life 1/2 over 1/4th over? How many more of your years are YOU WILLING to invest in a relationship that YOU FEEL isn't going anywhere or benefiting you? And then ask yourself if he was out of the picture would it be better for you? After that be serious with yourself and honest and know that while there are a lot of relationship problems present in marriages - picking the same type of men over and over has to be - your doing. Don't you want to know why? Do you want to fix that? If you said yes - then find a good counselor and take the first step to improving yourself. </p><p></p><p>You can't make him do anything. You can't force him to get counseling, you can't force him to take an interest in his children or you - but you CAN take an interest in yourself by investing the time it takes to complain about how badly you're treated by him and turn it into time that you are working with a therapist to improve yourself for the better. If you improve and empower yourself - you are ONLY insuring you won't choose to hang around with the same types of people, you will have self appreciation and KNOW that you deserve to be treated like an angel, and your children will be less inclined to treat YOU PERSONALLY like a door mat. But you have to get help to learn how to do that. IT's not something you can do on your own. </p><p></p><p>**Shakespear - don't just WISH it will happen MAKE it happen. You're a good woman - you deserve better than you are getting and you at least have the advantage to KNOW you deserve better. NOW take the next step and do something to help yourself. You can't worry about husband at this point - if he goes along to therapy - great. If he doesn't at least you're on your way to being the best YOU - that you can possibly be. Who wouldn't want a Mom like that? Go on - go get yourself some respect - tell yourself it's a present from Santa to you - </p><p></p><p>I KNOW YOU CAN DO IT - </p><p></p><p>Hugs</p><p>Star </p><p></p><p>And as far as Mr. Text messaging, giving you a skull cap in the middle of insanity for what you described as your day to day life the only thing that surprises me about that is that he didn't ask for sex after he handed it to you.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Star*, post: 102380, member: 4964"] Do me a favor - Make me a list of "WHY you stay" in a relationship like that. Out of that list I bet there are a bunch of us that can/will tell you what is a valid reason and what is a myth. Then ask him WHY HE stays - if his list starts out with "Because I love you." Tell him LOVE is giving someone the ability to hurt you but choosing not to do so." By not helping with the children, the house, the canceled therapy appointments - he's not being much of a friend. He's not behaving like a husband should, and he's certainly not being a good example to your children. True - we haven't heard his side of this, only yours. However - try looking at YOUR life for a minute. How old are you? How long do you 'think' you'll live to. Is your life 1/2 over 1/4th over? How many more of your years are YOU WILLING to invest in a relationship that YOU FEEL isn't going anywhere or benefiting you? And then ask yourself if he was out of the picture would it be better for you? After that be serious with yourself and honest and know that while there are a lot of relationship problems present in marriages - picking the same type of men over and over has to be - your doing. Don't you want to know why? Do you want to fix that? If you said yes - then find a good counselor and take the first step to improving yourself. You can't make him do anything. You can't force him to get counseling, you can't force him to take an interest in his children or you - but you CAN take an interest in yourself by investing the time it takes to complain about how badly you're treated by him and turn it into time that you are working with a therapist to improve yourself for the better. If you improve and empower yourself - you are ONLY insuring you won't choose to hang around with the same types of people, you will have self appreciation and KNOW that you deserve to be treated like an angel, and your children will be less inclined to treat YOU PERSONALLY like a door mat. But you have to get help to learn how to do that. IT's not something you can do on your own. **Shakespear - don't just WISH it will happen MAKE it happen. You're a good woman - you deserve better than you are getting and you at least have the advantage to KNOW you deserve better. NOW take the next step and do something to help yourself. You can't worry about husband at this point - if he goes along to therapy - great. If he doesn't at least you're on your way to being the best YOU - that you can possibly be. Who wouldn't want a Mom like that? Go on - go get yourself some respect - tell yourself it's a present from Santa to you - I KNOW YOU CAN DO IT - Hugs Star And as far as Mr. Text messaging, giving you a skull cap in the middle of insanity for what you described as your day to day life the only thing that surprises me about that is that he didn't ask for sex after he handed it to you. [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
General Discussions
The Watercooler
What would YOU do???
Top