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<blockquote data-quote="recoveringenabler" data-source="post: 622325" data-attributes="member: 13542"><p>Most of our difficult child's have inflated senses of themselves and are brats. And, rarely do they connect the dots between their behavior and the consequences of their behavior. He has you effectively backed in to a corner with only one exit, an apology to him for what HE did. Nice try. The arrogance and righteousness of his note to you are remarkable, written by someone very, very young who sees himself as a superior being and a superior thinker. And, the only position you or anyone can take is the 'wrong' position because he has the 'right' position tied up tight.</p><p></p><p>I think MWM's idea of limiting his phone by taking out the internet is a good one. He doesn't require internet. And, you don't need to reward him for his negative behavior. And, as time goes by, you can stop paying for the phone and his insurance too. I also don't think there is anything wrong with cutting the phone off completely, that is entirely your choice.</p><p></p><p>You HAVE been a good mother to him. HE is the loose cannon, not you, his skewered reality is his reality, not yours, you didn't do anything wrong, his perception of reality is seen through the eyes of someone who can't/won't accept responsibility for his actions and has to blame someone else. Don't join him in his reality, stay present in your own and continue enjoying your days!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="recoveringenabler, post: 622325, member: 13542"] Most of our difficult child's have inflated senses of themselves and are brats. And, rarely do they connect the dots between their behavior and the consequences of their behavior. He has you effectively backed in to a corner with only one exit, an apology to him for what HE did. Nice try. The arrogance and righteousness of his note to you are remarkable, written by someone very, very young who sees himself as a superior being and a superior thinker. And, the only position you or anyone can take is the 'wrong' position because he has the 'right' position tied up tight. I think MWM's idea of limiting his phone by taking out the internet is a good one. He doesn't require internet. And, you don't need to reward him for his negative behavior. And, as time goes by, you can stop paying for the phone and his insurance too. I also don't think there is anything wrong with cutting the phone off completely, that is entirely your choice. You HAVE been a good mother to him. HE is the loose cannon, not you, his skewered reality is his reality, not yours, you didn't do anything wrong, his perception of reality is seen through the eyes of someone who can't/won't accept responsibility for his actions and has to blame someone else. Don't join him in his reality, stay present in your own and continue enjoying your days! [/QUOTE]
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