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General Parenting
When can a child cry for help and feel safe?
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<blockquote data-quote="therese005us" data-source="post: 290914" data-attributes="member: 7416"><p>Well, what a frustrating day!</p><p>After psyching my little cherub up about going to the police station, with phrases like: 'let's go and talk to my friend about this, she said she'll help us talk to daddy about not doing that anymore because you don't like it!' etc. we arrived at the police station and the very nice female officer said that sorry, but as it was with another office, she felt she couldn't talk to cherub - apparently they had reopened the case after all. In fact, apparently even DOCs were looking into again! So, we had to go away and wait on that. I contacted the CV (the CV works for the Child Guardian Commission and is an advocate for any child in care) that has offered to help in this matter and told her what had happened. She said to ring DOCs (Dept of Child Safety) around 12 and see what was happening. Whcih I did. I spoke with the same person as the other day. She informed me that a case worker had been appointed, and she would contact the bio mum to speak to her about what the arrangements were for the weekend. She said that the original police would be reinterviewing again,but she didnt' know when At this stage there is no reason why cherub can't go back to mum as she hasn't made any disclosure to the police.</p><p>No one is planning to ring me back, but they have my name and number on data if they need to. End of discussion.</p><p> </p><p>An hour later I get a call from the Case Worker saying that she had a conversation with bio mum about her going for the weekend and they have put something in place to ensure safety of the weekend. When I asked what, she said she couldn't tell me, as it was private.</p><p>She said nothign came of the conversation that shows that mum isn't beign protective of the children. After the weekend, further assessment will be done by the police and department. </p><p>We have a family arrangement, therefore at this stage, nothing has been shown to say they need to intervene at this stage.</p><p> </p><p>I repeated all this to the CV. And then we discussed ways of avoiding taking the child back... there are not many options, as child is looking forward to a weekend with the family, as there is a birthday party for the 3yo Then I waited on bio mum to ring me. </p><p> </p><p>Bio mum said she'd been contacted by the dept and she went around to their office and signed a piece of paper to say that the daddy won't be left alone with the children, he isn't to bathe, change nappies or put the children to bed and should have an adult present at all times. Easy? child's safe now. He's allowed to sleep over too!! </p><p> </p><p>I feel much better about cherub's safety now!!</p><p> </p><p>Oh, and when the original policewoman phoned me and I told her I'd taken cherub to other police station, she said I shouldn't have. After she told me the case was closed... I should have waited... She said they're terribly busy and it's not a priority right now.....</p><p> </p><p>Safety of children,not a priority, it makes me sick!</p><p> </p><p>If any of us were raped, we could find help and support, crisis care, refuge within a matter of hours, WITHOUT havign to go to the police.... but children have to wait?? what is wrong with this world?</p><p> </p><p>I intend to make several phone calls to bio mum tomorrow evening when cherub is there, just for piece of mind... </p><p> </p><p>I've also had a little chat with her about safe touching etc. and not keeping bad secrets, but it's hard to know how much she takes in and understands....</p><p> </p><p>Please, all pray for this little cherub, and the other two. I am so worried.</p><p> </p><p>Sorry it was so long....</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="therese005us, post: 290914, member: 7416"] Well, what a frustrating day! After psyching my little cherub up about going to the police station, with phrases like: 'let's go and talk to my friend about this, she said she'll help us talk to daddy about not doing that anymore because you don't like it!' etc. we arrived at the police station and the very nice female officer said that sorry, but as it was with another office, she felt she couldn't talk to cherub - apparently they had reopened the case after all. In fact, apparently even DOCs were looking into again! So, we had to go away and wait on that. I contacted the CV (the CV works for the Child Guardian Commission and is an advocate for any child in care) that has offered to help in this matter and told her what had happened. She said to ring DOCs (Dept of Child Safety) around 12 and see what was happening. Whcih I did. I spoke with the same person as the other day. She informed me that a case worker had been appointed, and she would contact the bio mum to speak to her about what the arrangements were for the weekend. She said that the original police would be reinterviewing again,but she didnt' know when At this stage there is no reason why cherub can't go back to mum as she hasn't made any disclosure to the police. No one is planning to ring me back, but they have my name and number on data if they need to. End of discussion. An hour later I get a call from the Case Worker saying that she had a conversation with bio mum about her going for the weekend and they have put something in place to ensure safety of the weekend. When I asked what, she said she couldn't tell me, as it was private. She said nothign came of the conversation that shows that mum isn't beign protective of the children. After the weekend, further assessment will be done by the police and department. We have a family arrangement, therefore at this stage, nothing has been shown to say they need to intervene at this stage. I repeated all this to the CV. And then we discussed ways of avoiding taking the child back... there are not many options, as child is looking forward to a weekend with the family, as there is a birthday party for the 3yo Then I waited on bio mum to ring me. Bio mum said she'd been contacted by the dept and she went around to their office and signed a piece of paper to say that the daddy won't be left alone with the children, he isn't to bathe, change nappies or put the children to bed and should have an adult present at all times. Easy? child's safe now. He's allowed to sleep over too!! I feel much better about cherub's safety now!! Oh, and when the original policewoman phoned me and I told her I'd taken cherub to other police station, she said I shouldn't have. After she told me the case was closed... I should have waited... She said they're terribly busy and it's not a priority right now..... Safety of children,not a priority, it makes me sick! If any of us were raped, we could find help and support, crisis care, refuge within a matter of hours, WITHOUT havign to go to the police.... but children have to wait?? what is wrong with this world? I intend to make several phone calls to bio mum tomorrow evening when cherub is there, just for piece of mind... I've also had a little chat with her about safe touching etc. and not keeping bad secrets, but it's hard to know how much she takes in and understands.... Please, all pray for this little cherub, and the other two. I am so worried. Sorry it was so long.... [/QUOTE]
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