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<blockquote data-quote="TerryJ2" data-source="post: 526377" data-attributes="member: 3419"><p>Hi Kathy, welcome.</p><p>I am glad you made an appointment with-the pediatrician. I agree, tantrums are not normal for her age.</p><p>She may have anxiety issues, or something more. All you can do is start to search, which you are doing. Ask the pedicatrician for a referral. </p><p></p><p>When your daughter is calm, sit her down and talk to her in a calm voice. Tell her that you are concerned about her tantrums and lack of self esteem and while you want to help, you have to lay groundrules, so she knows what to expect. Tell her to use words when she is angry. Pulling her own hair will take away half of her allowance for a week (or whatever she will miss the most.) Just something to see if she can control it. Once she starts to pull her hair, calmly warn her of the consequences to see if she ramps up or stops. It's really an experiment. Although my son has anxiety issues, we have had luck by disciplining him when he has meltdowns, especially when he gets physical. We have told him that it is normal and healthy to get mad. It is not normal or polite to scream that you hate someone, so you have to say, "I'm mad at you!" We also take away privileges and games when he is physical (although he has been much better in the past few mo's.)</p><p></p><p>Just some ideas.</p><p></p><p>Best of luck!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="TerryJ2, post: 526377, member: 3419"] Hi Kathy, welcome. I am glad you made an appointment with-the pediatrician. I agree, tantrums are not normal for her age. She may have anxiety issues, or something more. All you can do is start to search, which you are doing. Ask the pedicatrician for a referral. When your daughter is calm, sit her down and talk to her in a calm voice. Tell her that you are concerned about her tantrums and lack of self esteem and while you want to help, you have to lay groundrules, so she knows what to expect. Tell her to use words when she is angry. Pulling her own hair will take away half of her allowance for a week (or whatever she will miss the most.) Just something to see if she can control it. Once she starts to pull her hair, calmly warn her of the consequences to see if she ramps up or stops. It's really an experiment. Although my son has anxiety issues, we have had luck by disciplining him when he has meltdowns, especially when he gets physical. We have told him that it is normal and healthy to get mad. It is not normal or polite to scream that you hate someone, so you have to say, "I'm mad at you!" We also take away privileges and games when he is physical (although he has been much better in the past few mo's.) Just some ideas. Best of luck! [/QUOTE]
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