Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
General Parenting
Where is the love? Can't even find that right now!!!!
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="susiestar" data-source="post: 356825" data-attributes="member: 1233"><p>Jody, I am sorry you are so terribly totally stressed right now. Our difficult children sure can suck the life and enjoyment out of almost anything, can't they?</p><p></p><p>Do you see a therapist? We are always here, but a therapist can give another point of view and other tools to help handle things. From your post I think you may find it helpful, if for no other reason than to reassure yourself that you are NOT crazy. You also may want/need to speak to your doctor about this. Many of us have needed the help of medications for depression and anxiety, etc... because life with a difficult child is just that awful. PLEASE talk to your doctor if you haven't. If you are taking medications, they may need tweaking. This is NOT to minimize the problems with difficult child, or to say you are nuts. This is simply to preserve whatever peace of mind and enjoyment of life that you can. Wiz would not have lived to age 12 if I had not been on prozac. Truly would NOT have survived. I saw the doctor when I realized I was either going to have a heart attack or stroke out from the pressure and strain or have my own psychotic break and murder him. I was WAY closer to that edge than I ever dreamed I would be. Prozac and xanax made a HUGE difference. HUGE. </p><p></p><p>As for things like the koolaid, WOW. She is certainly a difficult child. Seems to me like there would only be water to drink even if I had to put a chain and padlock around the fridge. I really don't have many suggestions to handle her, but I wanted to let you know you are not alone.</p><p></p><p>I think it is pretty normal to dream of life with-o your kids. My mom used to read the classified ads for jobs in the rich part of town where she could go be a live-in housekeeper. I can remember seeing the ads circled as a kid. I have dreamed about running away also. I bet many of us have. </p><p></p><p>On her birthday I think you should do something for YOU. Go and get a massage, a new book, have your hair and nails done, etc... YOU did the hard work on the day she was born, YOU deserve to be celebrated. I would problem at least do a card, but if you feel you just cannot, then you just cannot. I do understand being that worried and upset. I also always worried that giving gifts to a kid who treats you badly just reinforces the bad behavior, even if it is for birthday or Christmas or whatever holiday. </p><p></p><p>Can you tell her that if she doesn't shape up there will be no birthday celebration of any kind? Will it make her shape up? For some reason Wiz always shaped up right around his birthday (2-3 weeks before). He seemed to worry that I would "cancel" his birthday if he wasn't vastly improved. I NEVER said that to him or any of my kids, but he feared it anyway. (I DO tell the kids that if they sneak and see any hidden gifts for Christmas or birthday those gifts will be returned and the $$ will be spent on something to pamper ME for doing all the hard work of shopping, wrapping, catching them, listening to their half donkey reasons, and then returning the gifts. I only had to do it ONCE but Wiz was 8 and WOW did it stick!</p><p></p><p>You are not alone in not liking your kid.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="susiestar, post: 356825, member: 1233"] Jody, I am sorry you are so terribly totally stressed right now. Our difficult children sure can suck the life and enjoyment out of almost anything, can't they? Do you see a therapist? We are always here, but a therapist can give another point of view and other tools to help handle things. From your post I think you may find it helpful, if for no other reason than to reassure yourself that you are NOT crazy. You also may want/need to speak to your doctor about this. Many of us have needed the help of medications for depression and anxiety, etc... because life with a difficult child is just that awful. PLEASE talk to your doctor if you haven't. If you are taking medications, they may need tweaking. This is NOT to minimize the problems with difficult child, or to say you are nuts. This is simply to preserve whatever peace of mind and enjoyment of life that you can. Wiz would not have lived to age 12 if I had not been on prozac. Truly would NOT have survived. I saw the doctor when I realized I was either going to have a heart attack or stroke out from the pressure and strain or have my own psychotic break and murder him. I was WAY closer to that edge than I ever dreamed I would be. Prozac and xanax made a HUGE difference. HUGE. As for things like the koolaid, WOW. She is certainly a difficult child. Seems to me like there would only be water to drink even if I had to put a chain and padlock around the fridge. I really don't have many suggestions to handle her, but I wanted to let you know you are not alone. I think it is pretty normal to dream of life with-o your kids. My mom used to read the classified ads for jobs in the rich part of town where she could go be a live-in housekeeper. I can remember seeing the ads circled as a kid. I have dreamed about running away also. I bet many of us have. On her birthday I think you should do something for YOU. Go and get a massage, a new book, have your hair and nails done, etc... YOU did the hard work on the day she was born, YOU deserve to be celebrated. I would problem at least do a card, but if you feel you just cannot, then you just cannot. I do understand being that worried and upset. I also always worried that giving gifts to a kid who treats you badly just reinforces the bad behavior, even if it is for birthday or Christmas or whatever holiday. Can you tell her that if she doesn't shape up there will be no birthday celebration of any kind? Will it make her shape up? For some reason Wiz always shaped up right around his birthday (2-3 weeks before). He seemed to worry that I would "cancel" his birthday if he wasn't vastly improved. I NEVER said that to him or any of my kids, but he feared it anyway. (I DO tell the kids that if they sneak and see any hidden gifts for Christmas or birthday those gifts will be returned and the $$ will be spent on something to pamper ME for doing all the hard work of shopping, wrapping, catching them, listening to their half donkey reasons, and then returning the gifts. I only had to do it ONCE but Wiz was 8 and WOW did it stick! You are not alone in not liking your kid. [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
General Parenting
Where is the love? Can't even find that right now!!!!
Top