Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
General Discussions
The Watercooler
Who has come out of long term relationships
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="Suz" data-source="post: 83187" data-attributes="member: 29"><p>Karen, I was married for 25 years...27 years together. Our situation was very different from yours, though. </p><p></p><p>In short, I was deliriously happy the first year to be on my own. FREE!</p><p></p><p>The second year I grieved. HARD. Not for him but for the other losses. We really had a great marriage for many years. I loved being married. I was a good wife and enjoyed my role. And I missed the intimacy (still do) and feeling of belonging. I never pictured myself divorced (does anyone?). I used to tell ex that I would murder him before I would consent to a divorce. Imagine my astonishment when I was the one who wanted the divorce. I'm still shaking my head.</p><p></p><p>But I wouldn't change the decision.</p><p></p><p>By the third year I was starting to get stronger and by this year I've gotten lonely as heck. </p><p></p><p>So it does take awhile. And I think it's healthier to allow yourself those stages.</p><p></p><p>Meanwhile, exdh "replaced" and is currently engaged. He started dating her a few months after our divorce. And I am happy for him. I felt terribly guilty for wanting out and hurting him....but "men replace, women grieve" and it was true for us.</p><p></p><p>For you...........when I look at your situation from an observer's eye, I find it quite miraculous that you are even standing.</p><p></p><p>Look at the strength you've had to muster for your son. Then your Mom's illness and subsequent death. And your husband's infidelity and separation. It is too much for anyone to have to go through over several years and you've had to go through it in the last two years....and last few months. </p><p></p><p>In your place I would expect to be completely irrational at times, unbelievably happy and satisfied at times, confused, melancholy. ENRAGED, and maybe all of those things in the span of just a few minutes.</p><p></p><p>It is normal.</p><p></p><p>Hugs,</p><p>Suz</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Suz, post: 83187, member: 29"] Karen, I was married for 25 years...27 years together. Our situation was very different from yours, though. In short, I was deliriously happy the first year to be on my own. FREE! The second year I grieved. HARD. Not for him but for the other losses. We really had a great marriage for many years. I loved being married. I was a good wife and enjoyed my role. And I missed the intimacy (still do) and feeling of belonging. I never pictured myself divorced (does anyone?). I used to tell ex that I would murder him before I would consent to a divorce. Imagine my astonishment when I was the one who wanted the divorce. I'm still shaking my head. But I wouldn't change the decision. By the third year I was starting to get stronger and by this year I've gotten lonely as heck. So it does take awhile. And I think it's healthier to allow yourself those stages. Meanwhile, exdh "replaced" and is currently engaged. He started dating her a few months after our divorce. And I am happy for him. I felt terribly guilty for wanting out and hurting him....but "men replace, women grieve" and it was true for us. For you...........when I look at your situation from an observer's eye, I find it quite miraculous that you are even standing. Look at the strength you've had to muster for your son. Then your Mom's illness and subsequent death. And your husband's infidelity and separation. It is too much for anyone to have to go through over several years and you've had to go through it in the last two years....and last few months. In your place I would expect to be completely irrational at times, unbelievably happy and satisfied at times, confused, melancholy. ENRAGED, and maybe all of those things in the span of just a few minutes. It is normal. Hugs, Suz [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
General Discussions
The Watercooler
Who has come out of long term relationships
Top