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<blockquote data-quote="carolinwaxhaw" data-source="post: 541892" data-attributes="member: 14846"><p>Dear Juli: I agree with Dashcat. Your son has to "own" his choices and consequences of them. You and your husband have to love him through all of this, tho. It can sometimes help to remember that you are not alone and also that there are so many people out there who are going through something worse. It may help or it may not - it is never meant that your own circumstances and problems are insignificant in any way - - I know it is a slight comfort to me to know that there are other parents who have had worse/longer term issues with their child as my own daughter has been having multiple suicide attempts, issues, etc. and yet it comforted me to learn of another mom who has a daughter who has been dealing with the hospitalizations, admissions, PRTFs, etc for THREE years - - whereas this is very new for my daughter... I think a support group will ultimately help you and your husband and possibly your other son once you can let yourself get beyond the grief of others. That is the part of the PURPOSE of Nar-Anon and Al-Anon - - to help the families. I hope you can also get some support from whatever religious group you are a part of. Perhaps if you let your son know that you and your family are suffering with him and praying for him. Perhaps you can find a way to "confront" him in a gentle way with the fact that he can make either positive or negative choices, that he is a good young man with a whole future ahead of him....perhaps he can be uplifted somehow to seek help and let him know help is there. It is a hard time and I wish you the very best. God Bless</p><p></p><p>Carol</p><p>Mom to Jeff - 2/15/75-8/12/04</p><p>daughter - A 13.5 in a PRTF now//adopted, placed at 9 days of age</p><p>daughter - J 9.5 at home//adopted, placed at 5.5 months of age</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="carolinwaxhaw, post: 541892, member: 14846"] Dear Juli: I agree with Dashcat. Your son has to "own" his choices and consequences of them. You and your husband have to love him through all of this, tho. It can sometimes help to remember that you are not alone and also that there are so many people out there who are going through something worse. It may help or it may not - it is never meant that your own circumstances and problems are insignificant in any way - - I know it is a slight comfort to me to know that there are other parents who have had worse/longer term issues with their child as my own daughter has been having multiple suicide attempts, issues, etc. and yet it comforted me to learn of another mom who has a daughter who has been dealing with the hospitalizations, admissions, PRTFs, etc for THREE years - - whereas this is very new for my daughter... I think a support group will ultimately help you and your husband and possibly your other son once you can let yourself get beyond the grief of others. That is the part of the PURPOSE of Nar-Anon and Al-Anon - - to help the families. I hope you can also get some support from whatever religious group you are a part of. Perhaps if you let your son know that you and your family are suffering with him and praying for him. Perhaps you can find a way to "confront" him in a gentle way with the fact that he can make either positive or negative choices, that he is a good young man with a whole future ahead of him....perhaps he can be uplifted somehow to seek help and let him know help is there. It is a hard time and I wish you the very best. God Bless Carol Mom to Jeff - 2/15/75-8/12/04 daughter - A 13.5 in a PRTF now//adopted, placed at 9 days of age daughter - J 9.5 at home//adopted, placed at 5.5 months of age [/QUOTE]
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