allhaileris
Crumbling Family Rock
We've had daughter back a week and husband is falling right back into his horrible patterns again.
He's always been on daughter's case about getting her homework done. To the point of her being in her room, all day long never getting to do anything. She has a math Learning Disability (LD) and he gets mad at her time and time again for putting down wrong answers. I refuse to play this stupid game. If she doesn't do her homework, I really don't want to fight about it and have told the teachers such. They know that the aids are supposed to help on Thurs/Fri if her homework isn't done. And it's not like he actually teaches anything, he just tells her that it's wrong and to do it over. If I can't get it through to her by explaining it in a couple different ways, I figure she's not going to get it (for now) and it'll be brought up again. Or her teachers, who know how to teach, will show her.
He just called me complaining that she was sitting at the dining table for an hour and refused to do a single problem. Whose having a tantrum now? The 42 year old kid is. He got all huffy and complaining and I just didn't want to hear it. I am at work, I don't need to have a horrible mood because I'm having to tell him how to parent (that he never listens to). I hung up on him.
I keep trying to poiint out how he's messing up with her. I try to do this out of her earshot. Very rarely he seems to listen or acknowledge anything. Most of the time it's her fault, her problem for doing something wrong, never his fault for his sucky attitude (totally condesending, mean, mad at the world...none of which he'll acknowledge).
This part of me really, really wants to tell the social worker all of his bad issues, but I would assume they'd make a bigger deal of it all. He really just needs anti-depressants and something for his ADD. Just about every time I google some behavior of his that I'm puzzling over, the top results land on ADD. I *so* have two difficult children (by the way I really hate that term, which is why I don't use it).
He's always been on daughter's case about getting her homework done. To the point of her being in her room, all day long never getting to do anything. She has a math Learning Disability (LD) and he gets mad at her time and time again for putting down wrong answers. I refuse to play this stupid game. If she doesn't do her homework, I really don't want to fight about it and have told the teachers such. They know that the aids are supposed to help on Thurs/Fri if her homework isn't done. And it's not like he actually teaches anything, he just tells her that it's wrong and to do it over. If I can't get it through to her by explaining it in a couple different ways, I figure she's not going to get it (for now) and it'll be brought up again. Or her teachers, who know how to teach, will show her.
He just called me complaining that she was sitting at the dining table for an hour and refused to do a single problem. Whose having a tantrum now? The 42 year old kid is. He got all huffy and complaining and I just didn't want to hear it. I am at work, I don't need to have a horrible mood because I'm having to tell him how to parent (that he never listens to). I hung up on him.
I keep trying to poiint out how he's messing up with her. I try to do this out of her earshot. Very rarely he seems to listen or acknowledge anything. Most of the time it's her fault, her problem for doing something wrong, never his fault for his sucky attitude (totally condesending, mean, mad at the world...none of which he'll acknowledge).
This part of me really, really wants to tell the social worker all of his bad issues, but I would assume they'd make a bigger deal of it all. He really just needs anti-depressants and something for his ADD. Just about every time I google some behavior of his that I'm puzzling over, the top results land on ADD. I *so* have two difficult children (by the way I really hate that term, which is why I don't use it).