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Why do I even give a hoot ?
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<blockquote data-quote="susiestar" data-source="post: 513215" data-attributes="member: 1233"><p>Sounds like they are total conflama junkies. Conflict +drama = Conflama, I think it was maybe Maya Angelou who I first heard use the term, on some reality show where a bunch of women who had never made a good choice or lived with a consequence all moved into a house to get their koi together. I don't remember the show other than that word, but it is the perfect word.</p><p></p><p>I am sorry you have to deal with that. We have had it in my family too. Luckily we never lived close to the relatives who tried to turn their daughter into your niece. Sadly for niece, her mom died of cancer when she was a teen, but in some ways that wasn't terrible. Niece learned her mother had lesions in her brain and it explained a LOT, esp tossing niece out for hubby who tried to molest her. </p><p></p><p>As you cannot get distance, as I couldn't for a while from gfgbro and now-exsil, start making your plans to write "My relative married a Wack-job and raised another: 101 ways to mess with your crazy relatives". Plotting that book was my salvation! I didn't actually write it, though my father had some AWESOME things to add - things he wanted to do to his brother's wife, because he also had a bro who married a crazy person. I find that having that type of outlet really helps me not blow up. I also have been known to remind myself often that just because they are crazy doesn't mean I am crazy for caring about them. God cares for idiots too, doesn't he? (NOT meant to be flip - it actually is a mantra I have used to help cope wtih the fact that I DO care even if I have to cut the person out of my life.)</p><p></p><p>I think it upsets you partly because you work SO HARD with and for difficult child that it makes you frustrated when you see them bragging and indulging the difficult child that did not have to be. Esp when they think her dysfunctional life is wonderful. it is also hard to explain to your child exactly WHY his cousin is allowed to behave that way and he is so totally NOT. That is tough too.</p><p></p><p>If nothing else, know that you are NOT alone!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="susiestar, post: 513215, member: 1233"] Sounds like they are total conflama junkies. Conflict +drama = Conflama, I think it was maybe Maya Angelou who I first heard use the term, on some reality show where a bunch of women who had never made a good choice or lived with a consequence all moved into a house to get their koi together. I don't remember the show other than that word, but it is the perfect word. I am sorry you have to deal with that. We have had it in my family too. Luckily we never lived close to the relatives who tried to turn their daughter into your niece. Sadly for niece, her mom died of cancer when she was a teen, but in some ways that wasn't terrible. Niece learned her mother had lesions in her brain and it explained a LOT, esp tossing niece out for hubby who tried to molest her. As you cannot get distance, as I couldn't for a while from gfgbro and now-exsil, start making your plans to write "My relative married a Wack-job and raised another: 101 ways to mess with your crazy relatives". Plotting that book was my salvation! I didn't actually write it, though my father had some AWESOME things to add - things he wanted to do to his brother's wife, because he also had a bro who married a crazy person. I find that having that type of outlet really helps me not blow up. I also have been known to remind myself often that just because they are crazy doesn't mean I am crazy for caring about them. God cares for idiots too, doesn't he? (NOT meant to be flip - it actually is a mantra I have used to help cope wtih the fact that I DO care even if I have to cut the person out of my life.) I think it upsets you partly because you work SO HARD with and for difficult child that it makes you frustrated when you see them bragging and indulging the difficult child that did not have to be. Esp when they think her dysfunctional life is wonderful. it is also hard to explain to your child exactly WHY his cousin is allowed to behave that way and he is so totally NOT. That is tough too. If nothing else, know that you are NOT alone! [/QUOTE]
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