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Substance Abuse
Why do I let myself hope, just to be disappointed?
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<blockquote data-quote="toughlovin" data-source="post: 615923" data-attributes="member: 15801"><p>Lil, You son clearly has a serious drug problem.... doesnt really matter a whole lot if it is only pot or more than pot. From what you have said it sounds like more to pot to me, but again it idoesnt matter a whole lot. Drug use is clearly interfering with his life and his relationships. One thing someone said to me once which I think is very true.... when someone is an addict you cannot be the most important relationship in thier life. To an addict their most important relationship is with the drug!!! To them that getting high comes first! And yes they will all lie and steal to support that relationship even at the expense of their relationship with you!</p><p></p><p>So I dont think it is that your son doesnt love you anymore, right now he loves the drugs more. I know that hurts but it really is not about you it is about his relationship with drugs.</p><p></p><p>I am also guessing that he probably does feel guilty about his lying to you, and he was just trying to prolong the reality of him spending the money on drugs rather than on gifts for you. He may have had the best of intentions but the temptation got in the way. That is my guess.</p><p></p><p>I have often told my son that for a gift I would just like it if he wrote me something (he writes good poetry when he wants to). That would mean the world to me... of course so far this year I have gotten nothing but he is in treatment and safe so that is enough for me right now.</p><p></p><p>I agree that your son lying to you about getting a gift, and getting your hopes up is much worse than if he just did nothing. I understand your hurt.....but my guess is he already feels bad about it. I think most people with serious drug issues have serious issues with self esteem and feel pretty bad about themselves for some reason.</p><p></p><p>TL</p><p></p><p></p><p>Sent from my iPad using ConductDisorders</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="toughlovin, post: 615923, member: 15801"] Lil, You son clearly has a serious drug problem.... doesnt really matter a whole lot if it is only pot or more than pot. From what you have said it sounds like more to pot to me, but again it idoesnt matter a whole lot. Drug use is clearly interfering with his life and his relationships. One thing someone said to me once which I think is very true.... when someone is an addict you cannot be the most important relationship in thier life. To an addict their most important relationship is with the drug!!! To them that getting high comes first! And yes they will all lie and steal to support that relationship even at the expense of their relationship with you! So I dont think it is that your son doesnt love you anymore, right now he loves the drugs more. I know that hurts but it really is not about you it is about his relationship with drugs. I am also guessing that he probably does feel guilty about his lying to you, and he was just trying to prolong the reality of him spending the money on drugs rather than on gifts for you. He may have had the best of intentions but the temptation got in the way. That is my guess. I have often told my son that for a gift I would just like it if he wrote me something (he writes good poetry when he wants to). That would mean the world to me... of course so far this year I have gotten nothing but he is in treatment and safe so that is enough for me right now. I agree that your son lying to you about getting a gift, and getting your hopes up is much worse than if he just did nothing. I understand your hurt.....but my guess is he already feels bad about it. I think most people with serious drug issues have serious issues with self esteem and feel pretty bad about themselves for some reason. TL Sent from my iPad using ConductDisorders [/QUOTE]
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Why do I let myself hope, just to be disappointed?
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