Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Substance Abuse
Why do I let myself hope, just to be disappointed?
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="Lil" data-source="post: 615932" data-attributes="member: 17309"><p>Thank you all. It was a long, long day and I feel better this morning, actually getting solid sleep for a change. I guess mental, emotional and physical exhaustion was what I needed for that. lol But in the end, I still don't know what will happen. I suppose none of you do. While crying on my husband's broad and hairy shoulder last night I said, the worst part is my son doesn't care. I'd give practically anything to spend one more day with my mother and my son doesn't love me enough to spend 10 minutes. He told me much of what toughlovin said, that he's surrounded himself with people who just use and take and has fallen into the belief that is the way to live. That he thinks deep down our son loves me, but that he's forgotten how because he doesn't love himself. I've always believed my son had self-esteem issues. It was one extreme or the other. He resolutely refuses to cut his hair, dress "normally", etc., and says people shouldn't judge him on his appearance but accept him as he is. If we'd suggest he change anything about himself he'd take it as an attack...like we don't think he's "good enough" the way he is. (This is always, not new.) By the same token, he will allow himself to be used by his friends, using all his gas, letting them eat us out of house and home when he knows he'll get chewed out for it when we go to cook dinner and there's no food, but when he needs something, they all let him down. Like he tries to buy friendship, instead of make friends and people who let you "buy" them, they aren't real friends, but he can't get it through his head. </p><p></p><p>I don't know about the drugs, how bad it is, I know it isn't daily, because it's pretty easy to tell when someone's stoned or has been once I knew what I was looking for, God knows I could tell 3-4 times a week or more last summer. But he has only had one or two days in the last couple weeks I've known. Maybe he'd just more sneaky now. </p><p></p><p>He told us last night, he's going back to school this week, to try to re-enroll and appeal his suspension. He and his friend at school who's in the same boat (met thru the same classes, failed them all for failure to go - clearly they bring out the best in each other) are both going to try apparently. We told him, they may not let him back in; we wouldn't. We told him if they do, he better resign himself to going the entire semester and passing, or no other school is going to let him back in for a very long time if he fails again, so he better be sure. He said he would. But, I don't actually believe him; that he'll go and stay for the semester. I think, if they get in, as soon as student loans are in they'll drop their classes and take off. I won't get my hopes up on school. We're already out the rent since we have a lease we can't break, the rest is up to him. I'd love to get him help. I'd love to stick him in rehab and have him come out drug/pot/alcohol or whatever he's doing, free. But as long as he thinks his life is great, he'll never do that.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Lil, post: 615932, member: 17309"] Thank you all. It was a long, long day and I feel better this morning, actually getting solid sleep for a change. I guess mental, emotional and physical exhaustion was what I needed for that. lol But in the end, I still don't know what will happen. I suppose none of you do. While crying on my husband's broad and hairy shoulder last night I said, the worst part is my son doesn't care. I'd give practically anything to spend one more day with my mother and my son doesn't love me enough to spend 10 minutes. He told me much of what toughlovin said, that he's surrounded himself with people who just use and take and has fallen into the belief that is the way to live. That he thinks deep down our son loves me, but that he's forgotten how because he doesn't love himself. I've always believed my son had self-esteem issues. It was one extreme or the other. He resolutely refuses to cut his hair, dress "normally", etc., and says people shouldn't judge him on his appearance but accept him as he is. If we'd suggest he change anything about himself he'd take it as an attack...like we don't think he's "good enough" the way he is. (This is always, not new.) By the same token, he will allow himself to be used by his friends, using all his gas, letting them eat us out of house and home when he knows he'll get chewed out for it when we go to cook dinner and there's no food, but when he needs something, they all let him down. Like he tries to buy friendship, instead of make friends and people who let you "buy" them, they aren't real friends, but he can't get it through his head. I don't know about the drugs, how bad it is, I know it isn't daily, because it's pretty easy to tell when someone's stoned or has been once I knew what I was looking for, God knows I could tell 3-4 times a week or more last summer. But he has only had one or two days in the last couple weeks I've known. Maybe he'd just more sneaky now. He told us last night, he's going back to school this week, to try to re-enroll and appeal his suspension. He and his friend at school who's in the same boat (met thru the same classes, failed them all for failure to go - clearly they bring out the best in each other) are both going to try apparently. We told him, they may not let him back in; we wouldn't. We told him if they do, he better resign himself to going the entire semester and passing, or no other school is going to let him back in for a very long time if he fails again, so he better be sure. He said he would. But, I don't actually believe him; that he'll go and stay for the semester. I think, if they get in, as soon as student loans are in they'll drop their classes and take off. I won't get my hopes up on school. We're already out the rent since we have a lease we can't break, the rest is up to him. I'd love to get him help. I'd love to stick him in rehab and have him come out drug/pot/alcohol or whatever he's doing, free. But as long as he thinks his life is great, he'll never do that. [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Substance Abuse
Why do I let myself hope, just to be disappointed?
Top