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General Parenting
Why is it always my fault?
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<blockquote data-quote="meowbunny" data-source="post: 61645" data-attributes="member: 3626"><p>You're going to hate this idea but it is what worked for me. Granted, it wasn't an issue in my own home but it was an issue at my mother's. Mom felt she knew what was best for my child and would pretty much let her do whatever she wanted. After a few battles, I gave up and simply decided that my rules did not apply when my daughter was with her grandmother. Her house, her rules.</p><p></p><p>This saved a tremendous amount of battles. Things also changed the day my child shaved her dog, stole her favorite perfume and dumped it all over the couch, dyed her white Persian cat pink with kool-aid and cut up a Persian rug. This was all in the span of two hours. All of a sudden Mom asked what my rules were, how to handle her, etc.</p><p></p><p>As I said, I know your situation is different because it is still your house. The one thing I'm not sure of is whether your father actually knew the kids were in punishment mode. Just having the kids know is never enough. I think even the most well-behaved child would be reluctant to tell a sitter they're in trouble. </p><p></p><p>However, if this were my situation, I would either give my father explicit instructions as to what the kids can and cannot do or, more likely, let things be pretty loose and accept the fact that things will not be qas I want them when I get home. No matter what, I would not expect someone else to enforce my consequences. It just becomes too hard for all involved.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="meowbunny, post: 61645, member: 3626"] You're going to hate this idea but it is what worked for me. Granted, it wasn't an issue in my own home but it was an issue at my mother's. Mom felt she knew what was best for my child and would pretty much let her do whatever she wanted. After a few battles, I gave up and simply decided that my rules did not apply when my daughter was with her grandmother. Her house, her rules. This saved a tremendous amount of battles. Things also changed the day my child shaved her dog, stole her favorite perfume and dumped it all over the couch, dyed her white Persian cat pink with kool-aid and cut up a Persian rug. This was all in the span of two hours. All of a sudden Mom asked what my rules were, how to handle her, etc. As I said, I know your situation is different because it is still your house. The one thing I'm not sure of is whether your father actually knew the kids were in punishment mode. Just having the kids know is never enough. I think even the most well-behaved child would be reluctant to tell a sitter they're in trouble. However, if this were my situation, I would either give my father explicit instructions as to what the kids can and cannot do or, more likely, let things be pretty loose and accept the fact that things will not be qas I want them when I get home. No matter what, I would not expect someone else to enforce my consequences. It just becomes too hard for all involved. [/QUOTE]
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Why is it always my fault?
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