I don't doubt that she can get it together and function as an independent eventually, Melissa. The problem is that the baby
will have had years of stability at your home and in my humble opinion will not be able to transition based on when she is ready to face life as
a healthy adult.
on the other hand easy child/difficult child had all those stable, loving years with us before his
GFGmom "pretended" to be capable of occasional trust. She did
introduce him to the low life way of living (with all the instant
gratifications that come with it!) and he began to drink & smoke!
All of his RTCs, therapists and POs have commented that no matter
what poor choices he makes he is different from most of the young
men because he openly speaks of his love for us and our home. It
is seen as a potential for reform that most don't have.
difficult child, sadly, spent his first five years primarily with his Mom and
some months with us. He is now 16 and still shows the signs of
not being properly bonded as a small child. He was left with a
variety of babysitters, friends, etc. in addition to spending
time with the three of us. He is still an insecure child.
Your Grandson will benefit from every year you keep him with you
where he does not have to "sense" the lack of stability of difficult child
lifestyles. That's why I think you need to stay nearby when he
visits with his Mom. I don't think she would purposely do anything to harm him...but..GFGmoms just tend to draw "friends"
and chaos into their daily life, and that can concern little boys
and girls.
You'll figure it out. I have confidence in you. DDD
