Work vent - ugh.

Marguerite

Active Member
Star, as a woman who has been where you are (and survived) I have a couple of suggestions for you.

1) Don't stand for it, but at the same time don't burn your boats until you have another exit mode in place. However, there is no reason for being a doormat. When you described the others as "gone to college, have degrees, nice homes, nice cars..." you implied yourself as being the opposite. And it sounds so much like my oldest sister, who keeps saying things like, "But I'm stupid." She may have begun saying this partly to deflect her emotionally abusive ex and partly out of irony, but she has come to beleive it. She won't believe us when we tell her that her old apprenticeship qualifications are the equivalent of a uni degree these days, plus her decades of experience in the field. as a result both professionally and personally, she is a doormat. And to be a doormat even partly, is to have your abilities not seen and not properly used. Now, your response to these fellas - that ws you not standing for it - partly. But you need to follow through at a higher level.

2) Write a nice note to your boss outlining what you do in your job. Show him how what you do comopares (in terms of remuneration) to similar jobs elsewhere. Then go into more detail of other small things you do to help him make even more money. Then finish your letter with, "In the time I have worked for you, my income has increased X amount. In real terms this is an increase of Y%, which compares to the Z% CPI increase in the same period of time. In the same period of time, other salaries in the business have increased Q amount. The business has increased in value by G amount. I beleive I am eligible for a raise. I understand that times are difficult in the economy right now but I also believe that it is employees like me that will help this company ride it out and come through to prosper. If you refuse my raise I will understand that times are currently difficult, but I do have my finger on the pulse of this business and recognititon of my worth as soon as the business can carry this, would encourage me to continue working hard to ensure your success."
Or you could keep it simple. "I work hard for you. I haven't had a raise in X years while others around me have. I beleive I am eligible for a raise and look forward to hearing the results of your consideration in this matter."

3) Find the name of this woman's consulting firm and ask her if she needs a junior partner, or if she knows somewhere where your skills would be valued. Also try to get a copy of her report, then use it to apply for jobs elsewhere. Times ARE tough, which is why people like you are even more valued than usual.

In my case, I worked with two blokes, one of whom at least was constantly white-anting me. Utter 'ratbags' (I'd like to use a stronger word but it would be insulting to their mothers). So I asserted my rights by annually applying for promotion. It took about three years but I finally got promoted. I also took on extra duties which I used to justify the requested promotion.

A hint - my added duties were related to occupational health and safety, especially in terms of supporting the boss in ensuring that the building we were given the use of, complied with government regulations. We then put together a proposal for upgrades to the building in order to make it safe. I also organised the evacuation procedures as well as wrote up and collated the operating procedures and instruction manuals. If you don't trust him to back you up, do this but keep the files available only through you. Be indispensible.

You already have a lot of capability when it comes to recognising and lopping dead wood. Why not go freelance yourself? Maybe on a part-time basis, take a day off to go do an inspection somewhere and see how it works. Then go part-time at your current job in order to build up a private consultancy, bit by bit.

I agree, some men can be very frustrating. On the subject of strong British accents working in the US - they'd better not get too uppity. Don't they realise that in fact they are working lower down the social and business ladder (by being in the US) than if tyhey stayed in Britian? Don't they feel they have what it takes to work on home turf?

In the earlier days of Australia, younger sons of the gentry were often sent to Australia to learn farming techniques, management skills and business techniques. And also get them out of the way from family rivalry while the older son got on with running the family estates. They were known as the "colonial experience men" and were a pain in the rear to Aussie workers. The thing is - they were sent here because they were inferior. And they knew it. Of course, they felt they were superior to us (because we were all descended from convicts, weren't we? or people like them!)

There is often a reason for people being dead wood. But there's no reason you have to be a tortoise and carry them on your back.

Marg
 

Star*

call 911........call 911
Marg -

Well....that came out wrong. I have a home, I have an education, I have a 20 year old car that gets me from A-B. I have a loving family and what's more important I don't base my wealth by how many "things" I have. I've had and lost more things twenty times than they will have in two lifetimes. My saving grace in "luxury items" is knowing that material things are just that - material. So the part about what they have (although poorly demonstrated - agreed) was meant to show that THEY think those things are important #1. Not me. I am lucky enough to have lost all those things a number of times. Faith, Family, Health, Ability, Manners, Empathy, Sympathy, Knowledge, Hindsight are more important than "things".

With regards to writing it all out? been there done that and it was whisked over and then I was offered six months after my annual raise was due. Fifty cents. The men were offered a dollar on their anniversary. VERY important they were offered a cost of living expense raise. They all get 1/2 their insurance paid too, plus gas card, telephone service and other benefits I do not get. I asked if the .50 cents was retro. He laughed. I told him to keep it and then said - "well the least you can do is pay for my insurance every month." I don't know if I caught him off guard or what - but I got it. Twice now he's tried to take that away. Nothing doing. It's there. As far as my "duties" - if I want to keep my job in these times? Tick a lock. Know what I mean?? But good advice on looking for a new boat. I'd like to find a new harbor in another state. ;)

As far as the woman - she had already told me if she was in the market for a jr. asst. I'd be it. While that was very flattering, it doesn't put meat in the pot.

I'm not doubting MY abilities - I just have too many things that feel like they are holding me here. Mostly financial, some are health and I just have to get a plan together that works to move me forward. I feel like a car stuck in the sand. I need traction.

Thanks for the advice - I welcome it very much - helps me think out loud.
 

Marguerite

Active Member
Thanks for the advice - I welcome it very much - helps me think out loud.
_

Sometimes that's what we need. You sound like a darn good worker who's hooked into a rut and not valued for what you can do. Right now I'm feeling the same - stuff has happened since I posted and I SHOULD be going to bed right now, but I'm too angry. I volunteered for a newly established local charity working for children's literacy, and Ive found we're being increasingly micromanaged by someone who doesn't know very much but refuses to use the valuable knowledge in the heads of us old hands.

Tonight I've had clear evidence that my expertise is not only not recognised, it's not valued. We were rushed in a crisis so I took it on myself to plug a hole by using my contacts and past experience - and I find this person who doesn't know what she's doing, has basically told me to get back in my box and stop interfering while she fixes it - at a cost. I offered my not inconsiderable services for free, and we don't know any of the people she's talking about bringing in, we don't know if they have any experience or capability.

Grrr... I never thought I would need to take my own advice so soon!

At least you know your own worth. Your boss sounds like an ass. He definitely is taking you for granted.

A suggestion - if you get another job offer, let your boss know, see if he tries to engage in a bidding war for your services. Imply to him you've been headhunted. I would love to know his reaction!

Marg
 

ThreeShadows

Quid me anxia?
- Ne aspernandi animos tuos affligant:
Don't let the despicable ones get your spirits down!

I'm working on "of course you realize this means war!".
 

Star*

call 911........call 911
Shadow, Shadow, Shadow.

??????

Is it?

Nimirum vos teneo , opes bellum


Where is Mrs. Cat in the Hat? SHE is also a lover of languages - :D


My favorites - are the words that if written right side up say something very kind and pleasant - like Have a Nice Day - and then if turned upside down and read say something really not nice. :surprise:

I can't remember what they are called or I'd do a google search for more - I forget right now, BUT I have the Have a Nice Day in my office - and it looks to be rather Asian/American in it's font. When you turn it upside down? It's totally NOT nice and I'm the only one who knows. :tongue: (I also took THAT down when the consultant came) but I left the one on my pencil go round that said - Sarcasm - just another service I offer. :surprise: ( That was duly noted...lol) :ashamed:

 

Marg's Man

Member
With regards to writing it all out? been there done that and it was whisked over and then I was offered six months after my annual raise was due. Fifty cents. The men were offered a dollar on their anniversary. VERY important they were offered a cost of living expense raise. They all get 1/2 their insurance paid too, plus gas card, telephone service and other benefits I do not get. I asked if the .50 cents was retro. He laughed. I told him to keep it and then said - "well the least you can do is pay for my insurance every month." I don't know if I caught him off guard or what - but I got it. Twice now he's tried to take that away. Nothing doing. It's there. As far as my "duties" - if I want to keep my job in these times?

Do you have anti-discrimination laws you could use against this bloke? Half the increment,fewer benefits for the same work? These sort of things sound a shoe-in to me.

It sounds very similar to the grief easy child 2/difficult child 2 is getting at the moment from her boss.

In that case the advice is similar - set up a new job, make the threat to sue for discrimination and be ready to bail if it goes bad.

Marg's Man
 
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