tiredmommy
Well-Known Member
Duckie is a pretty insightful person. She brought up the subject of my mother today. She has noticed that we don't talk to her or see her anymore. She also overheard my brother and I talking. She wanted to know why and, specifically, if it's because mom is mentally ill.
I assured her that mom's bipolar plays only a small part in her problems and behavior and added that many people lead happy, normal lives while living with mental illness. We talked about the drinking and drug use and how they became more important than the people that love mom. And her behaviors make me uncomfortable. They also make Duckie uncomfortable. She said she never knew what to expect when mom is around. I also made it clear that, despite her addictions and behaviors, that my mother was still her grandmother and is to be treated with respect and dignity even if we don't go out of our way to interact with her.
She asked me why, if my mother had been this way for years, husband and I stopped dealing with her now and not before? I told her that I was concerned about how my mother might affect her. She told me that I'm not a lot like my mother, that I'm a good mommy for wanting to keep her safe.
I assured her that mom's bipolar plays only a small part in her problems and behavior and added that many people lead happy, normal lives while living with mental illness. We talked about the drinking and drug use and how they became more important than the people that love mom. And her behaviors make me uncomfortable. They also make Duckie uncomfortable. She said she never knew what to expect when mom is around. I also made it clear that, despite her addictions and behaviors, that my mother was still her grandmother and is to be treated with respect and dignity even if we don't go out of our way to interact with her.
She asked me why, if my mother had been this way for years, husband and I stopped dealing with her now and not before? I told her that I was concerned about how my mother might affect her. She told me that I'm not a lot like my mother, that I'm a good mommy for wanting to keep her safe.