you cannot make them drink, even if they are dehydrated hanging by their sallow skin. ant was mugged last friday. sunday he showed up at boyfriend's house while I was there. we hugged and I told him this is not going to end til one of us is dead. he refused to stay at BFs and went back to his apartment with some girl who had a gun to stay and protect them. I am not kidding his apartment is in a war zone looking area crawling with creeps in the daylight even. so I made a mistake. I gave him 30 bucks. he was broke, boyfriend gave him a bag of food from the cupboards. I told him to buy simple food for the week and not eat out. he ate out on the way back to his apartment. he bought cigarettes. monday he had one dollar left. I know I know I should have gone and given him two bags of food instead. whatever! he can starve as I am not giving him anything. boyfriend on the other hand is buying his lunch every day til friday. so he gets one meal. not my problem. sunday boyfriend called a friend nearby his house who had a lovely apartment closer to boyfriend, safe area, less money. we went and looked. I would not mind being there myself. wrap around porch, big window with a view of the park, safe secure, a nice family living downstairs of the place. I told boyfriend I would front the security deposit and one month rent and the guy said he would give a short lease to see if he liked it so we would not be tied in long. boyfriend said he would take the money out of ant's wages to pay me back what I put out. my risk would be if ant went back to jail I would have to pay a couple month's rent for an empty place. after much thought boyfriend took ant monday to see the place and told him our plan. ant said no. he said he will stay in war zone. his choice. problem because war zone has two bars he can walk to and prostitutes all over the place. so that was my final offer. deal or no deal. No deal. no further offers will be given. I noticed after I am sad and spend a few days mourning, it is followed by some plan of action and then I let it go. I must learn to be more patient with the plan unfolding.