This is the re-evaluation of your daughter for the IEP, it's a different standard than for the IEP. We had to do this. In the social history, lay out all that has been going on in her life and your efforts to keep up with her school work. A good FBA would be very useful in helping to figure out how and when to reintroduce her to school and how to keep her functioning at her best while there. Do NOT let the school psychiatric do it - insist on an outside evaluator. You can probably submit your own physicals and you decide if speech/language, Occupational Therapist (OT)/PT are issues. If you don't want them, they may not insist. It would be just one more level of services to provide. We had to go all through this again when we returned oldest boy to IEP after switching him to 504 for the transition to middle school.
You should definitely seek out an advocate. PM me and I'll send you the name of the agency I spoke to. It's in my county, but I think it handles yours, too, and if not should be able to refer to one that does.
For the meeting with the superintendent, I HIGHLY recommend a small, digital tape recorder. H and I never meet with the schools without one. In fact, there was a time when we sent difficult child to school with one that he would turn on in his math class. In NY, taping is legal as long as one party is aware of it. That party would be you.
I would also recommend having a written agenda with talking points outlined so you don't get off track. List the items in order of importance... I would not demand that he have the school stop communicating with CPS; only CPS can terminate the case. I would discuss with him that you are aware that the school has to protect itself but that you are and always have been willing to work with them. Your ultimate goal is to have your daughter back in school but she is not ready yet due to her health issues (do not say due to her emotional or mental issues, ONLY physical at this point). She does not have the physical stamina to be in school and her eating has to be carefully monitored. She needs homebound instruction. On this note, I would say that you understand that eight hours per week is standard (that's what we were given for our son and what my friends who've had HB instruction have had as well) but that difficult child has been out of school so long that you are hoping that she could get 10 - 12 hours a week to help her catch up. Pretend they never said 8 hours total (that had to be a misstatement).
It's easy to fall in to the adversarial mode but try not to. If you can make the super your friend, you will have accomplished a lot. If he knows and likes husband, he may be disposed to help you as much as he can. We have met with our super so much that he greets us in the supermarket because he knows us, in fact, when easy child got into a fight with super's son, super took our son's side and called his own son a liar! He even knew difficult child's PSAT score and congratulated him in the hallway one day!
You might also want to see if you can get an ally in Pupil Personnel. Their agenda is different from the school's. It was PPS who helped me get my difficult child out of the class he was in and who was instrumental in having him placed in honors classes where he needed to be. The people in PPS are there because they usually want to help the children. If you haven't met with them yet, ask for a meeting in advance of the 504 meeting.