easy child pierced her own ear!

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by smallworld, Apr 6, 2007.

  1. smallworld

    smallworld Moderator

    I don't know if I can keep calling her a easy child . . .

    easy child has had pierced ears since last summer. Yesterday she kept talking about how she wanted a second hole in one ear. She even tried to push an earring through her ear and made it bleed. She said her cousin (age 15), whom we had all seen last weekend, had pierced her own ear recently and had suffered no ill effects. I told her that her dad and I needed to talk about whether we wanted her to have a second hole, and if we agreed to it, it would need to be done in a safe way (like at the pediatrician's office, where she got her ears pierced over the summer). I also spared no detail about how much an infected ear can hurt and how much it costs to visit the doctor if an infection occurs. I truly thought easy child understood my concerns and agreed to abide by the conditions I set forth.

    This morning easy child was awake not more than 30 minutes when her sister came running to find me and tell me that easy child had pierced her own ear with an earring. She is 8 years old! I'm proud to say that I did not yell at her, but I did tell her that I was disappointed she had not followed the rules and that her dad and I would need to talk about an appropriate consequence. She said she felt guilty about doing it, but she couldn't help herself. She also said she really liked the way it looked and wanted to keep the earring in so the hole wouldn't close up.

    Late this afternoon, we talked some more, and I suggested that she take the earring out because it was not something we had agreed upon. She reluctantly did, but then went into suicide talk: "You hate me. I hate my life. I want to kill myself." She even took out a scarf and wrapped it around her neck. I grabbed the scarf and hid it from her. She continued with the negative self-talk for about an hour until her evening dose of Zyprexa kicked in. After she fell asleep, I noticed that the earring was back in the hole she pierced this morning.

    Needless to say, we are watching her closely and have placed a call to her psychiatrist. Does anyone have any idea what all this is about? Need for instant gratification? Depression? Prozac activation? In spite of all their own issues, my two GsGF never would have pulled anything like this. I'm not sure what to make of it at all.
     
  2. Fran

    Fran Former Site Owner

    I don't really know whether this behavior is indicative of anything or not.
    If it were a teen, I would probably chalk it up to normal teen stupidity. 8yrs old is a little young.
    I'm sure it hurt. Makes you wonder about kid's brains. Although I do like 2 holes. LOL.
     
  3. pepperidge

    pepperidge New Member

    Wow. Two things come to mind. One is that easy child has a capacity to inflict pain on herself (not eating, ear piercing) that is rather remarkable and scary for an 8 yr. old. I think I would be more worried that she could do something that would hurt so much more than actively defying you, I guess. My son would also say the same thing about us hating him and wanting to kill himself but never came close to being actively suicidal I believe.


    The second is the Prozac thing. When my 10 yr old was on prozac we had a couple of shoplifting incidents and one setting a small fire incident. The latter was particularly out of character. Once we removed the Prozac we didn't have any more incidents of this type. Don't know whether that is what is going on with your easy child. But she has been on Prozac for a while now, right? Have you seen anything else that makes you wonder?

    Sorry. I know you don't need any other worries right now.
     
  4. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Will throw this out there...dont know if it helps at all or not.

    Cory self pierced his own ears plenty of times over the years. He said it didnt hurt. Maybe it just didnt hurt her for some reason. I seem to remember this as a fad going around in school back in the dark ages. Something to do with ice and a sewing needle and a cork. Im reaching far back into the recesses of my mind. I think that is how I pierced my ears but cant really remember because they are now closed.
     
  5. SRL

    SRL Active Member

    I was as easy child as it gets at age 11 and I pierced my own ear. Well...almost pierced--that last bit hurt so I stopped. A lot of girls were doing it back then with a needle dipped in rubbing alcohol and a potato. Most girls got along just fine and most didn't tell mom and dad but sometimes the moms or other adult would do it for the girls. I wouldn't make a big deal of it. Make sure she has a good quality earring in there and cares for it well.

    It wouldn't surprise me to see this happening at younger ages. Age 12 was pretty typical for getting ears pierced back then but at least in our school it's down to about 2nd grade.

    If this is a standalone incident I would call it typical easy child behavior. It looks like there's already a diagnosis and medications in place-I wouldn't be concerned about the incident itself but would watch the suicide talk of course.
     
  6. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful

    Each person has a different pain threshold. I've had my ears pierced several times and I've never felt it yet. It hurts N every time. easy child it doesn't faze. My Mom acts like she had major surgery. lol

    in my opinion it's a pretty typical kid thing. Although easy child is a bit young. Still everything seems to be being done at earlier ages now. I wouldn't worry much about the piercing itself.

    The suicide talk with her being on Prozac does bother me. I'd make sure to ask the psychiatrist.

    Hugs
     
  7. guest3

    guest3 Guest

    egads........................<<HUGS>>
     
  8. DazedandConfused

    DazedandConfused Active Member

    8 years old is a little young for a kid to pierce their own ears. Like Fran, if she were a teenager, I would have chalked it up to a teen thing. I remember my cousins piercing their own ears as teenagers when I was a young child.

    However, a very good point was made about various pain tolerance levels.

    Piercing along with the suicide talk and behavior would have me very concerned. I would definitely get her to the psychiatrist and look into the prozac.
     
  9. Lothlorien

    Lothlorien Active Member Staff Member

    I second the poster that talked about the combination of suicide talk and Prozac. You should get an emergency call to psychiatrist. That is a red flag!
     
  10. Wiped Out

    Wiped Out Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Smallworld,
    I can understand your frustration, sounds like you are on top of things with calling the psychiatrist. Hugs.
     
  11. smallworld

    smallworld Moderator

    Thanks for all your replies.

    Fran, I had to laugh at your comment that you like two holes. Even though I was so POed at easy child for taking matters into her own hands, I had to admit to myself that her handiwork looked stylish. In fact, the placement of her second hole was right on target.

    If easy child had been a teen, I don't think I would have given this incident a second thought. But at 8 years old, she's still a little girl. There's no puberty in sight whatsoever; in fact, her sister, at age 12, just started developing ever so slightly last fall.

    husband and I decided to let easy child keep the new piercing because we didn't inherently disagree with having it; we just wanted her to have it done properly and with our permission. Her consequence is having all her earrings (except for the ones in her ears) taken away for the next two weeks. This is a hardship for easy child because she considers herself a fasion maven and spends considerable time coordinating earrings with outfits.

    Once we agreed to let easy child keep her new piercing, difficult child 2 was not to be outdone. She insisted on getting a second piercing in her ear done today. We took a quick trip to the mall, and all went off without a hitch. Both girls will be religiously swabbing their ears with alcohol several times a day for the next month or so.

    easy child is calmer today and a bit contrite. She even helped wash dishes after dinner tonight. No talk of suicide all day. She has an appointment with her psychiatrist scheduled for Monday afternoon.

    I've been concerned about the Prozac for a while and have discussed the issue with the psychiatrist many times. Even though Prozac has clearly addressed easy child's anxiety and allowed her to conquer her choking phobia, her moods do tend to switch quickly, and she sometimes seems over-the-top in her reactions. I've seen mania in difficult child 1, and it doesn't exactly look like that, but I do worry that she seems at times too happy or too sad. We'll have to see what the psychiatrist says on Monday.

    Thanks again for your concern and insight.


     
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