Marguerite
Active Member
Karen, you said, "Apparently she was in a very abusive relationship before him, so he must be like dating a prince!"
It does sound to me like she's one of those people who keeps making the same mistakes, always letting herself be hurt over and over. She's come from one abusive relationship (probably more) and is already bending over and saying, Kick me!"
Remember those Kigmees from Lil' Abner? Just get a mental picture of one every time you mention her...
And Witz is right, too - he's too good at this disrespect stuff, it's too well practised. It's like he's never known anything else, which is such a horrible thing for you.
And I also agree with the others about making him sign an acknowledgement of every $ you give him. It needn't be shown to the tax office, but it's covering you if he tries to play any silly games about "she never gave me the money". Also from things you've said, he's not good with money and let loose on his own he's likely to soon want more just because he's so poor at managing his own affairs (in every way!). Even though you are managing everything and you have your hands on the bulk of the assets - it's just another bit of paperwork to make sure everything stays clean and green. All you need is a sheet of paper with a column showing cash out, and a line with the amount, the date and his initials next to it when he collects it. If you want to include a code phrase as well to clarify, but I don't think you would need it. Just the date and amount should be amply clear to show that he acknowledges receipt of $x on such-and-such a date...
As you said, you have two beautiful children and you are now growing and changing positively, emerging from your chrysalis. He doesn't deserve the butterfly you are becoming.
Marg
It does sound to me like she's one of those people who keeps making the same mistakes, always letting herself be hurt over and over. She's come from one abusive relationship (probably more) and is already bending over and saying, Kick me!"
Remember those Kigmees from Lil' Abner? Just get a mental picture of one every time you mention her...
And Witz is right, too - he's too good at this disrespect stuff, it's too well practised. It's like he's never known anything else, which is such a horrible thing for you.
And I also agree with the others about making him sign an acknowledgement of every $ you give him. It needn't be shown to the tax office, but it's covering you if he tries to play any silly games about "she never gave me the money". Also from things you've said, he's not good with money and let loose on his own he's likely to soon want more just because he's so poor at managing his own affairs (in every way!). Even though you are managing everything and you have your hands on the bulk of the assets - it's just another bit of paperwork to make sure everything stays clean and green. All you need is a sheet of paper with a column showing cash out, and a line with the amount, the date and his initials next to it when he collects it. If you want to include a code phrase as well to clarify, but I don't think you would need it. Just the date and amount should be amply clear to show that he acknowledges receipt of $x on such-and-such a date...
As you said, you have two beautiful children and you are now growing and changing positively, emerging from your chrysalis. He doesn't deserve the butterfly you are becoming.
Marg