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zba189
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husband and I met with the Licensed Clinical Social Worker (LCSW) at the Residential Treatment Center (RTC) that my difficult child is currently at (Wow that was a ton of acronyms for one short sentence) for the first time since he was admitted.
Here's where we stand right now. They are leaning towards one of three things or a combination of them that would explain T's issues. They have determined that he has ADHD and are trying to narrow down what is driving it. Executive Order Disorder, Visual Learning Process Disorder, or NonVerbal Learning Disorder (NVLD). Because of his Birthmother's NonVerbal Learning Disorder (NVLD), they are leaning more towards this end of the diagnosis. They have given him a simulate this week to see if this will curve the ADHD issues. He is still being treated like he has a mood disorder as well. They are treating the symptoms, while wading through the diagnosis (which I think is great).
He is scheduled for a NeuroPsch. in October and a genetics test (due to the HGH issues and thyroid issues- along with some physical malfunctions). The malfunctions are not indicative of Fetal Alcohol Syndrome (FAS) but perhaps something else. His PCDOC met with his Endo and they can't come up with a syndrome that would match these issues, but they are as the PCDOC said "covering their butts".
Here is where I'm struggling. His Licensed Clinical Social Worker (LCSW) believes that I'm too emotional attached to T. I'm confused by this statement for the pure fact that I come at this from the world of an adoptive mom. For years, I have worked to make sure that my kids are secure in their attachment to our family and that I am to them. If I'm not emotionally attached than I'm not a good mom, if I'm too emotionally attached than I'm not a good mom. Licensed Clinical Social Worker (LCSW) words were that I'm tightly wound up in trying to help him and that he believes that "I'm desperate" to find a way to help T. I feel like I got thrown under the bus today. I know this sound petty and stupid, but shouldn't I be seeking ways to help T even if he is at an Residential Treatment Center (RTC)? He's coming home in less than a month. The Licensed Clinical Social Worker (LCSW) said that with a NonVerbal Learning Disorder (NVLD), you can pretty much plan on the fact that he will never be alright. That he will be made fun of, unable to hold a job, and will never find a spouse. He will be bitter and unhappy for the rest of his life. Keep in mind, T is six.
I know that the future for T has changed. I have grieved the loss of what might have been, but I'm unwilling to stand by and believe that this is the end of his life or ours. There is no crystal ball, but I can't help but feel like this isn't the end of the world either. I actually feel some sense of relief in the fact that I have known something wasn't quite right for a long time with T. But for all the things that just frustrate the heck out of me with him, but he has an amazing insight on life that I'm would have never thought of if it wasn't for him.
I'm not discounting all of what the Licensed Clinical Social Worker (LCSW) said. I know that he has no emotional attachment to the kids that he helps and so it is easier to tell it like it is. But ya'll are mothers and fathers and maybe you can tell me like it is from the standpoint of someone who loves their child but is real about where they are at. Can I find a happy medium between being too emotionally wrapped up in this and not caring at all?
Here's where we stand right now. They are leaning towards one of three things or a combination of them that would explain T's issues. They have determined that he has ADHD and are trying to narrow down what is driving it. Executive Order Disorder, Visual Learning Process Disorder, or NonVerbal Learning Disorder (NVLD). Because of his Birthmother's NonVerbal Learning Disorder (NVLD), they are leaning more towards this end of the diagnosis. They have given him a simulate this week to see if this will curve the ADHD issues. He is still being treated like he has a mood disorder as well. They are treating the symptoms, while wading through the diagnosis (which I think is great).
He is scheduled for a NeuroPsch. in October and a genetics test (due to the HGH issues and thyroid issues- along with some physical malfunctions). The malfunctions are not indicative of Fetal Alcohol Syndrome (FAS) but perhaps something else. His PCDOC met with his Endo and they can't come up with a syndrome that would match these issues, but they are as the PCDOC said "covering their butts".
Here is where I'm struggling. His Licensed Clinical Social Worker (LCSW) believes that I'm too emotional attached to T. I'm confused by this statement for the pure fact that I come at this from the world of an adoptive mom. For years, I have worked to make sure that my kids are secure in their attachment to our family and that I am to them. If I'm not emotionally attached than I'm not a good mom, if I'm too emotionally attached than I'm not a good mom. Licensed Clinical Social Worker (LCSW) words were that I'm tightly wound up in trying to help him and that he believes that "I'm desperate" to find a way to help T. I feel like I got thrown under the bus today. I know this sound petty and stupid, but shouldn't I be seeking ways to help T even if he is at an Residential Treatment Center (RTC)? He's coming home in less than a month. The Licensed Clinical Social Worker (LCSW) said that with a NonVerbal Learning Disorder (NVLD), you can pretty much plan on the fact that he will never be alright. That he will be made fun of, unable to hold a job, and will never find a spouse. He will be bitter and unhappy for the rest of his life. Keep in mind, T is six.
I know that the future for T has changed. I have grieved the loss of what might have been, but I'm unwilling to stand by and believe that this is the end of his life or ours. There is no crystal ball, but I can't help but feel like this isn't the end of the world either. I actually feel some sense of relief in the fact that I have known something wasn't quite right for a long time with T. But for all the things that just frustrate the heck out of me with him, but he has an amazing insight on life that I'm would have never thought of if it wasn't for him.
I'm not discounting all of what the Licensed Clinical Social Worker (LCSW) said. I know that he has no emotional attachment to the kids that he helps and so it is easier to tell it like it is. But ya'll are mothers and fathers and maybe you can tell me like it is from the standpoint of someone who loves their child but is real about where they are at. Can I find a happy medium between being too emotionally wrapped up in this and not caring at all?