Hindsight

[Liahona]

I've been thinking about this awhile. I've been wondering what some of the other moms of Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD) kids would've done differently. Maybe I could learn a few things.

for example, I would've let difficult child 1 go to the Residential Treatment Center (RTC) when he was 6 like his therapist wanted instead of waiting until he was 10.

 

[AnnieO]

In regards to Jett, there isn't much I could've changed given that I'm not his bio and had no control. But... I probably would've pushed harder for a neuropsychologist earlier, had I known they existed. Ah well, we do the best we can with what we know.

 

[Bunny]

I think that having 20/20 hindsight is not always a good thing. We know things now that we might now have known then and that can sort of cloud your judgment. I agree with Step. We do the best that we can at the time.

And for what it's worth, I don't know if I would have been willing to send my 6 year old difficult child to an Residential Treatment Center (RTC), either. That seems so young.

 

[InsaneCdn]

If the tests that we needed had been available more than 5 years sooner... it would have made a huge difference. But, of course, WE had no control over that.

If it had been possible to get an accurate diagnosis earlier...

Notice all the IFs?
Guess what?
If we'd had those answers sooner, we'd probably have had more questions, and more time to mess up in other ways.

When I'm dishing out advice on this board, though... the absolute number one "do if you can" is to push and push and move mountains if you have to, to get a complete and accurate diagnosis - even though it usually takes years to get there. There is no substitute for starting as early as possible and staying in for the long haul.

 

[DDD]

Ditto the others. IF we had "known" then what we "know" now.........life might have been a heck of alot easier. That's not just true with children but with spouses too. Sigh! DDD

 

[buddy]

It gets so overwhelming all the things I would do differently....but one thing for sure, I would NEVER have agreed to a single program that had EBD programming only. Even the one Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD) class he had in first grade where they changed the program to a mixed Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD)/EBD class. Every single time it was a disaster.

I almost got pushed into it when Q switched last year and what they offered was a class supposedly for kids with Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD) or unique learners...but the entire rest of the building was EBD.

For him, it has always ended up in power struggles, failure, low self esteem etc. I will do my best to make sure he is not in programs, even in the health care system, for people who have his symtpoms due to mental health conditions. Not that those programs are bad. They are just not a good match for him.

 

[TeDo]

If I had known then what I know now, I would have listened to the visiting nurse when difficult child 1 was about a year old. He was behind on some milestones but not enough for ME to be concerned. They questioned Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD) way back then. I should have listened instead of dismissed what they said. I was looking at him as "perfect" yet and didn't want to see any problems with my new baby. We could have avoided a LOT of things and he'd probably be a lot better than he is if he'd have had the interventions starting way back then.

Also, I would have questioned the psychiatrists more about medications instead of just "trusting the professionals". I didn't give myself enough credit and gave them WAY too much.

Oh well, I know now and am doing the best I can with what I have. We don't have as much time but we do have some time to improve his quality of a future life.