I Guess I Should Say

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by Janna, Feb 7, 2007.

  1. Janna

    Janna New Member

    that I'm sorry for my over the top emotional response to Allan's post yesterday.

    I think those that know me, and have talked with me outside the site, know how strongly I feel on the subject of behavioral modification. For those that didn't, well you do now :rofl:

    In all seriousness, it was brought to my attention (although I already knew) that my post was a little over the top, to say the least.

    I am in an emotional pit right now with difficult child 2. I really don't want to discuss it. I am not myself. I am a very angry, bitter, resentful, pissed off mother right now, and probably not the best source of support.

    That being said, I think I should take a little break from CD.com. I am not doing it to NOT be supportive, but rather to sustain from saying something out of strong emotion that I may not necessarily mean or want to say in the way directed at that very moment.

    I am an emotional mess and so I don't think I should be bringing that here. But I will read when I can, and try to come back healthier as soon as I can.

    Hugs to you guys,

  2. tiredmommy

    tiredmommy Site Moderator

    Janna, You have a lot on your plate. It's time for you to carve out some "Janna" time so you can sort through all the emotions you are feeling. Come back soon.
  3. mstang67chic

    mstang67chic Going Green

    I don't really know what to say other than something you already know......we're here for you whenever you are up to it. Do what you need to, do what you have to, take care of yourself and check in/come back when you can. Sending all the hugs you can use and a shoulder if you need it.

    * <----------------- hug from the frozen midwest
  4. Wiped Out

    Wiped Out Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Sending many gentle hugs your way. Take care of you. Remember we're here for you. Here's an angel to help along your way. :smile:
  5. Andrea Danielle

    Andrea Danielle New Member

    I am sending my best wishes to you too from here in cold Toronto. We all get to that point, take some time for you and focus on getting through this tough time. We are all here for you when you come back!

  6. smallworld

    smallworld Moderator

    Janna, I'm sorry for the way you're feeling. It sounds as if you know you need time for yourself right now. I hope you know that we care very deeply about you and will always lend a shoulder when you need it. Hugs, my friend.
  7. Fran

    Fran Former Site Owner

    Janna, I'm sorry that things are a little disheartening. A little break is good if you feel you need one. We will be here when you come back.
    Personally, a little ride on the party bus for a little sun and fun seems like a good thing too. I'll swing by and pick you up.
  8. timer lady

    timer lady Queen of Hearts


    No apology necessary - I believe each of us has reacted in an emotional way, either here on the board or out in public. There is no right or wrong here - just your feelings.

    Take the time you need - know that we are here to support you.
  9. amy4129

    amy4129 New Member

    My friend,
    I will miss you while you are gone but glad you are taking time for you. Please let me know if you need anything...you aren't that far away. I can always roadtrip.
  10. PiperThree

    PiperThree New Member

    Janna, you take care of you. We'll all be here when you are ready to come back. Feel free to PM me if you ever want to vent (or talk about chocolate!) :smile:

    ((((BIG HUGS))))

  11. Marguerite

    Marguerite Active Member

    Janna, take the time you need. I must admit, I've not read Allen-Matlem's thread although I keep meaning to, because I have limited energies and have to make choices. So I haven't been exposed to whatever-it-is that has set you off.

    However, with all you've shared about difficult child 2, I think I can surmise... that talking about behaviour modification, with difficult child 2 in mind, is like the time I went to see my GP because I wasn't sleeping. I was trying to work full-time (stressful, high-energy job) while dragging my kids in to the work child care centre so I could also continue breastfeeding difficult child 1 at every opportunity. And the little darling would wake every three hours through the night for feeds as well. I would feed him before I went to bed, taking about an hour to get to sleep, then when I was woken to feed him two hours later I would find that I couldn't get back to sleep and would be maybe just dozing off when the baby would wake again. This would continue until sunrise when it was time to get up and drive to work. I was away from home 12 hours a day, working hard, JOGGING to the child care centre for feed times and barely surviving on two hours' sleep a night. After two weeks of this I was a walking zombie and desperate for some medical intervention and all the doctor could say was, "Have you tried drinking a glass of warm milk?"
    My first reply was unprintable. The next thing I said was, "I'm way beyond warm milk. In fact I'm way beyond the double vodka stage. I need pills. Gimme!"

    It's like when difficult child 1 was having trouble writing essays in Ancient History, because he simply can't determine which fragment of text has the information he desires. He can't hold more than one thought in his head at a time. Anything he has to do or learn MUST be written down, as I had repeatedly told the school. It is a really serious problem which we'd worked at for years. Intensively. Then I got a bright, chirpy call from difficult child 1's Ancient History teacher. "I know you said he has a little difficulty writing essays..." ("little difficulty"??!? Try insurmountable obstacle) "...but I've sorted it out now. He and I sat down together and I spent about half an hour explaining to him how to write an essay..."

    Gee, why didn't WE think of that? And we had spent years, husband & I, losing entire weekends (all day and late into the night) trading places with each other while always one of us sat with him and works with him on essay writing and text summarising. And all we needed to do was have a pleasant half hour chat??!?

    Janna, it's hard to hold on to your perspective when you're as overwhelmed as you have been. And a lot of what people write here - it's what has worked for them, or for other people we know. And if it works for some or even most, that's fabulous. But it's hard to be happy when you know there are no answers right now for YOU. And right now, that's what you need.

    Honey, we're always here for you. You've also been there for a lot of us at times. Get yourself some "Janna" time, do your nails, whatever you have to do. We'll be here when you're ready.

  12. busywend

    busywend Well-Known Member Staff Member

    I think women in general need to take more 'ME' time to evaluate where they are at and what their feelings are. We tend to push our own needs to the back burner. I hope you take some time to figure out what makes Janna a happier girl. I know - worrying less about our difficult children would work, huh? Wish that one was easy.
  13. Lori4ever

    Lori4ever New Member

    I hope you get some much needed rest and relaxation for you. I'm sorry you're in a bad place. I hope it gets better for you soon. Take care of yourself, okay?
  14. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    I didnt think you were all that harsh. It was an opinion...we all have them. I assume we are still allowed to share them.
  15. helpmehelphim

    helpmehelphim New Member

    Janna, I send some armor your way...I'll share some of mine. As others have said, no apology necessary. I understand and that's why I posted back at the time. Please take care. I've taken breaks too...sometimes they are so necessary.
  16. TexasTornado

    TexasTornado New Member

    Oh Janna,
    Hugs-comin your way. You will be sorely missed, but I totally understand where you are coming from. You have alot on your plate-time for YOU time!
  17. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful


    I hope you take some time for yourself to recharge and relax if you can. You've been having an awfully rough time of late. I'm sure all of us have "gone over the top" over things important to us at one time or another. I know I have in the past, and heck probably will again sometime in the future.

    Sending (((hugs))) and know we'll be here.
  18. Lothlorien

    Lothlorien Active Member Staff Member

    Janna, I sure hope things cool down a bit for you soon. I hope a sensible solution with difficult child 2 can come soon and something that you can all live with.
  19. houseofcards

    houseofcards New Member

    I will miss your insights as well, come back soon. I admire your commitment to your kiddos and have followed your story for awhile now and find you an inspiration. I also thing that our kids are all so different we need all the tools we can find to get things moving along as best we can. I don't believe there is a "one size fits all" out there. Take care of yourself and know that alot of people value and care about you here.