If I hear this one more time......

Discussion in 'The Watercooler' started by timer lady, Feb 23, 2009.

  1. timer lady

    timer lady Queen of Hearts

    I'm going to scream!

    You know those phrases that you hear time & again....the ones that make you want to do violence.

    I'm tired of hearing how strong I am (I'm feeling extremely fragile & needy of late ~ to be honest, most of the time I'm faking it anyway).

    But the one that's getting on my last nerve is "kt & wm are just being TTs". I have to say there is nothing typical about my teens. Nothing. TTs don't have need for 24 hour supervision, with stints in RTCs, years of day treatment & Integrated Listening Systems (ILS) workers, PCAs or both. typical teen - geeeeeez.

    So what phrase are you hearing that makes you just want to gag? Or do violence ~ maybe something in between? Hmmmmmm? :crazy2:
     
  2. flutterbee

    flutterbee Guest

    I, too, get tired of being told how strong I am. Like you, Linda, I'm faking it most of the time these days.

    I cringe when my son says, "Yeah, but you're disabled. You can't help it." Don't get me wrong, I'm happy that he understands my limitations and helps out as much as he does. But, it makes me feel so...inadequate.

    I, too, want to scream when someone says my daughter is being typical teen. There is not much typical about her.

    And if my mom asks me what time I got up again, I'm going to lose my mind. I'm doing the sleeping thing again. "What time did you get up?" Around 2:00. "Oh, you're going to be up all night." No, actually, I'll make it for another 3 hours or so (if I'm lucky) and then I'll be asleep again. I. cannot. stay. awake. I will fall asleep sitting up - something I never used to do. We have this conversation almost every day. (I know I've mentioned this one before. Several times.)

    The new one is....

    Me: I'm freezing. I'm running another fever.
    Mom: Have you been taking vicodin?
    Me: No. The pain hasn't been that bad. And even if it were, I'm not awake enough to need it.
    Mom: Well, maybe you're so cold because you're withdrawing from vicodin.
    Me: No. I actually took my temperature. I have a fever.

    You know, the fever that accompanies every flare? The fever that I run at least a week out of every month?

    In case you couldn't tell, I'm having a rotten month and am at my limit and pretty much *everything* is making me want to scream.

    Maybe I should just scream anyway. Might make me feel better.

    Care to join me, Linda?
     
  3. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    "It's growing pains." Pediatric rheumatologists have been saying there is no such thing for a long time now. And even if there were - they don't last for months on end and have the child crying every night and falling over and over. They just don't. They also don't explain why she cannot open a non=childproof medicine cap.

    "She just needs to tough it out." If you are sitting there with tears streaming down your face because your back is in spasm and you KNOW if you cry it will be even worse, well, that is beyond toughing it out. If the ER would DO anything we would have spent yesterday there.

    "I already toooooooook the garbage out today" as it is overflowing. Boy, I know a little about this world. And if no on has been cleaning, there is no way the garbage can got filled up if you emptied it today. No. Way.

    That high-pitched ringing in my ears that just lives there anymore. Drives me nuts.

    "I have to go to the bathroom." Only bugs me when said 2 minutes after we have gotten into Walmart, the grocery store, or a store with-o a bathroom. Or 3 minutes after we have just BEEN to the bathroom!

    Those are this week's pet peeves. Thanks for this thread. Nice to know I am not alone in the wanting to scream dept.
     
  4. Marguerite

    Marguerite Active Member

    What bugs me - the people who say, "You are so brave." To me, bravery is having the choice to run into a burning building to rescue a cat. If you have no choice, it's not bravery. It's just endurance. And although I am glad to hve my stoic endurance noted, I am no more special than anyone else. There is no excuse for having your feet knocked out from under you, and not getting up out of the dirt to keep on going afterwards.

    I also hate the comments of, "There's nothing wrong with him that a good smack wouldn't fix."

    Or "pull yourself together. Snap out of it." and similar, generally from people whose problem is that they don't WANT to undertand, they would reather deny YOU the right to have adversity. It's THEIR problem but they want to make it all about me, purely because of the lack of backbone and compassion in themselves.

    Marg
     
  5. house of cards

    house of cards New Member

    I am most frustrated when I try to tell husband or my family members just how hard my life is and stressed out I am and they don't say anything at all. Then they just keep piling on me more stuff that they "need" from me. It's like I am screaming for help but I don't make a sound.
     
  6. Andy

    Andy Active Member

    You mean besides: "Mom............"? We have to be more specific? Even though that very first word will indicate an issue?

    "Mom, will you take me to Wal-Mart?" (diva)

    "Mom, you buy Diva anything she wants. I don't get anything. How much did you spend on her? You need to spend that amount on me." (difficult child who must be related to his dad's side of the family because that is exactly what husband's mother did with her kids - even when they were adults - when she bought one a birthday gift, she had to run out THE SAME DAY and get an equal value item for the other two kids who will feel left out because birthday kid got something and they didn't. Say what!???)

    We have started the habit of seperating items on the conveyor belt. We put the little bar between my items and Diva's. Then we tell the clerk "These two sections will be paid as one but we want them bagged seperate." difficult child has gotten into the habit of watching for how much of the cost is of Diva's items so that he can complain - especially if hers is over 1/2 of the total. Her items usually goes first so we do have a clear look at her costs. Last night, mine went first so difficult child had to do the math to see what twice my cost would be and if the total came up to that.

    I hate taking the two of them shopping together anymore. It is always a battle telling difficult child that it is none of his business how I spend money.
     
  7. KTMom91

    KTMom91 Well-Known Member

    Along with "Mom..." is "I need..."

    No, you don't. You don't "need" to go to Burger King, there's food in the fridge.
     
  8. rejectedmom

    rejectedmom New Member

    I hate when people tellme that my difficult child "just needs to mature a bit" UG! If it were only a simple matter of maturity. -RM
     
  9. Star*

    Star* call 911........call 911

    Yup - I have been inundated with that same phrase all last week and Saturday. At one point I just walked away and thought "Okay, the amount of thought you put into that phrase was as weak as you are, but since I'm STRONG - I can take it." (groan)

    And you know - I also got "Dude is just acting like a typical teen" from one person in a group of gossip mongers (because well the kids brother died in a crash and he should just act like a typical teen) so I said "WOW - all this time of him being out of control and everyone talking about his behavior and me and us behind our backs and all it took was his brother's passing in an auto wreck to have ANY of you recognize his behavior as a typical teen." - YUP.....I'm probably not going to get invited to that book club again. :mad:

    Gosh Star - said DF - why didn't you say what you mean? :sick:
     
  10. Star*

    Star* call 911........call 911

    OH and by the way -

    I WANT THE CHICKADEE.......HE"S GEORGEOUS and the detail on the bark? Magnificent - you are really starting to come along on this bird art. He's stunning! - Big fan!
     
  11. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Good thread!

    I am so sick of hearing some form of ....oh you look so good, its great you didnt die, you must be feeling so much better, someone (insert finger pointing up) must have had BIG plans for you, and last but not least....you seem like you can do everything now.

    Oh lordy...Im doing good just to do some basic things like drive Billy to work and pick up a few things from the store!
     
  12. Star*

    Star* call 911........call 911

    I've been reading this book on Grief and how to help children though it and you can't belive the number of things in this book that are said - to people who are grieving whether it's through sickness or death - that are SO inappropriate and contradict faith. Things that I think I may have even said trying to find some words of comfort, any words to help and when you say them to your OWN situation? They are lame and just make the person grieving angry.
     
  13. DaisyFace

    DaisyFace Love me...Love me not

    Good Morning, All--

    I am tired of hearing that everything would be OK if husband and I weren't so hard on difficult child. We just need to be more {insert adjective here}.

    I am equally tired of hearing that everything were be OK if husband and I weren't letting difficult child get away with everything. We just need to be more {insert adjective here}.

    And I am soooo sick of hearing the whining, the complaining, the stupid bickering fights over NOTHING...and even though we are acting like toddlers we want to be treated like a mature young adult. (Yea, because I am so impressed with all of the mature behavior...).

    I am tired of hearing expressions like "God only gives us what we can handle." and "Whatever doesn't kill us makes us stronger."

    I am tired of hearing about everything going Up, Up, UP--except wages, hours, benefits and jobs--those we're cutting back.

    And last but not least, I am tired of hearing from the woman at the lottery counter:
    "I'm sorry...It's not a winner."


    --DaisyF


    PS--Whew! Thanks for this thread! Perhaps we need to start each day with a morning vent...ya know, just to get it out of our system.

    :tongue:
     
  14. busywend

    busywend Well-Known Member Staff Member

    "Parent don't get breaks."
     
  15. gcvmom

    gcvmom Here we go again!

    I feel like screaming when people, in a feeble attempt to make you feel better, minimize whatever difficulties you are having by pointing out what "the good news is" or explaining how things could be worse. husband's family is famous for doing this. I think it's their attempt to avoid actually dealing with the pain or gravity of a situation through deflection.

    Another statement that bugs the crud out of me is the one frequently uttered by well-meaning teachers who tell me or a difficult child that they just need to "try harder." That the difficult child is a smart kid so they should be able to [fill in the blank].

    It's very easy to stand on the outside and tell someone what you think they are doing wrong. I liken it to someone on the outside of a tent trying to tell someone on the inside how to juggle. There is so much more to it...
     
  16. hearts and roses

    hearts and roses Mind Reader

    Three things:

    "She just needs to find her niche" - regarding difficult child.

    "God only gives you what you can handle" - phooey!!! I'm tired of being peceived as so strong, so steady, so logical - ugh!

    "Mom?"
     
  17. Star*

    Star* call 911........call 911

    Just an FYI - to those of you upset by the "more than you can handle" thing - and not to be an original thumper but.......

    Try this because the reactions are amazing. The last time I heard it - I cracked, and I think many moons ago we had a thread about it here. Without getting preachy - I will tell you that that particular phrase is NOT and I repeat NOT taken in the context that it was meant. You'd have to read about ( a man named Paul in the book we all take to sunday school )to get it. It was a quote to his plight at that moment in time and has been paraphrased to death. But truly ask the next person that says that to you if they know in the (book we take to SUnday school -so as not to get religious) where it says that. They can't - because it doesn't. So there. :faint: and fyi I am a (person who carries my book to sunday school) :angel3:person.
     
  18. mrscatinthehat

    mrscatinthehat Seussical

    I have a handful that make me want to act very violent.

    You need to make this accomodation or that accomodation for the difficult children. ( I am about accomodated out)

    You have to understand.....

    You

    You

    You

    Then of course it's the big one.... How are difficult child 1 & difficult child 2 doing these days? This question is the most dreaded because if they were doing better or accomplishing something believe me I would tell them.

    I am just tired of it all be husband and I that are responsible for it all. If we would only just do this....

    Then with easy child I am tired of the eye rolls on the fact that she is a good kid.

    beth
     
  19. Wiped Out

    Wiped Out Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Right now the sound of the voices of both my children!

    "Mom, can you get me..."

    "It wasn't me..."

    "You're so mean." (and that's the mild one, others I can't print here)

    I know there are many others that adults say but can't think of them right now, can you tell my kids are in the background fighting?
     
  20. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful

    :rofl: Janet....5 yrs later I still get that. :faint:

    Mine are:

    "But he looks perfectly normal." (Travis)

    I actually blew up at that once and asked if they expected a Troll. (ok, so it was more than once but I've heard it at least a million times in just 22+ yrs)

    "You can't be allergic to Benedryl, it's allergy medication." Um, ok. Tell my hives that.

    You all took my other ones. lol

    Good thread. I won't get started on the Traumatic Brain Injury (TBI) ones, because I've heard them for 5 yrs and I might not be able to stop if I start. ;)
     
Loading...