So what do they call you in Mexico? Adios?....Just a little sad humor there but then again if our lives you have to take it where you can get it.
You know I have lived a life and a 1/2. Maybe two...no; just one, but if a life were gauged by the shear weight of bull**** you could pack into one tiny life? I think I'd put myself down for a three ton life....just from my former marriage alone. And wasn't he a peach?! No....not really. More like a rotten apple. Apple is too kind, more like a watermelon that sat out in the sun and got too ripe and sprouted little fuzzy mold or something then tried to be a man. (thinks a moment) Onion - maybe he's an onion. Fruit of some sort to be sure. Festering, smelly - OKAY then......back to your question.
Exhales.......(pauses for dramatic effect) (howd that work?) Anyway....I think back about all the people that I used to have in my life with their so-called perfect children. WHAT A LAUGH. First there is no such thing as perfect. It's a facade. There is a perception of perfect and yes LORD do I understand what you THINK is the wonderland of the lunch table talk. "Well my so is having trouble with the SATs and we're going to have to cut back on our third vacation this year and I'm not going to be able to get a new car until October. It's tough." and I hear this while I'm choking down yet another PBnJ from week old bread from the food bank I ran and got on yesterdays lunch 1/2 hour in my 21 year old rather dependable car without air conditioning...while talking to my son on my $11.00 Walmart junk phone who is having yet another "CRISIS" about his life that I can not possibly solve - but you know what? It's my life, I have a car, I have a phone, I have a job after a year and a half, I have a sandwhich, and I can talk to this son. The others are dead.
So back to perception......My not so perfect life includes a son that has done some very not so perfect things......things that by MOST peoples standards would leave them not wanting to stand next to him, or wanting thier children to even play with him (and that's happened too) or wanting me to really REALLY not be a part of their cliquey world although to my face they play nicey nice and pretend that I BELONG in with their crowd and could be with their type at any time and it made me wonder over the years - WHAT MAKES you think YOU belong with ME? I'd welcome almost anyone to sit and talk with me - and I raised my son to be the same way. I like that we're friendly and helpful, and non-prejudicial, but admit that we're prejudiced and think that anyone that says they aren't is basically a liar - people like their own kind plain and simple but what is your own kind? I raised my son to not have a KIND. I'm the same way to a point.....I don't like people that think they're better. So yeah I'm prejudiced.
As far as having to tell people all our business or warn EVERYONE about my son. The people that do not like him don't need a warning from me. The people that like him and he screws over? Aren't going to like him - that's nothing to do with me and no reflection on my part - that's his bad. The people that would hold that against me? Need their head examined. I raised my son to be a good person. Where he goes from there? On him. Would I warn anyone? No. People will make their own minds up no matter what YOU say about someone. You could tell me that Judy over there is a jerk. I may like Judy and she may be just the nicest person on earth for me. You tell me she's a jerk - she ends up nice.....now whose the jerk? Know what I mean??
As far as people who have NOT stayed around in your life BECAUSE of things your son has done.....well I'd actually thank your son. Those were not real friends or true friends anyway. Why would you want them around? I have told people for years - my son cut a lot of fakers from the herd.....and I'm thankful for it. His accuracy rate is 100%. What a waste of time THAT would have been to play nice with fakers all those years to find out I had a knife in my back anyway after all? Saved me......all I can say.
As far as the ones he hurt? It only took them once on getting burnt - and well - none hold it against me. They know me, my character, and that I raised a child who had issues. I don't say illness, or problems anymore. I just say he has things he is working through and hope someday he's the guy that I KNOW he can be. Until then - he's his own person making his own choices and if they are poor choices? Then yup....name someone who hasn't make a poor choice growing up.....hope he learns from it - moves on from there and continues to grow up to make better ones - I'm too old, too tired and too detached to be involved in things that don't make me happy.
That INCLUDES - people that want to sit around and put down my son -------so if you got taken in --------I'm sorry but my best advice is to not have anything to do with him, and leave me out of it.
Oh and as far as the lunch table talk? I have So many interests.........Those that tend to want to talk ONLY about their CHILDREN......??????? I usually will ask "SO do you have ANY other hobbies OTHER than your children? I never hear you talk about reading or pets, or going out with your husband or things you enjoy doing for YOURSELF.....just.......the kids." and try to get the hyper focus off children.....
Or I'm famous for saying "OOOOOOOOOOOOO KAY well today I thought we could talk about FLOWERS.........or BOOKS...........OR clothes.......lipstick............weather........" I need just ONE day where we are NOT talking about KIDS.........NEED A BREAK FROM KIDS........
Yeah - I'm that blunt.
and believe it or not - most times OTHER women in the lunchroom would chime in HAPPILY........about flowers, books.......sports, weather........fashion.........cars.........because there are more of us than there are of THEM.
Hasta la vista baby