I am new here. I stumbled on this site looking for support with a problem I am almost too embarassed to say out loud. I'm hoping for some clarity and understanding. My SS will be 18 in a few weeks. I have been waiting for this day for 7 long years as I will no longer be at all legallly responsible for anything he does. In a nutshell....our life has been He!! for 7 years. SS is ODD borderline conduct disorder with sociopathic tendencies. He has been physically and verbally abusive to me, husband and the other kids for many years. He and husband moved out 2 years ago because he threatened to kill me, and I felt my kids deserved a life free of violence. My kids are now at college and SS is a senior. husband and he moved back in in Sept. with the understanding that if there is even a hint of violence, SS would move out. I have been living on eggshells ever since counting the days until he graduates and moves out. The abuse is no longer overt, but his basic personality is the same. He is never at fault, and is always the wronged party. husband served 20 years in the Army. He was a very respected and was quickly promoted. He is a man of honor and courage. SS will never be even half the man husband is. SS just signed up with the Army. Apparently having been arrested and being a sociopath is not a reason to be disqualified! I have huge reservations about why he chose to join the militray. I think it is some weird way to prove to his father that he can do all his Dad did. He has a 1.2 GPA so college is not a choice. So here is the part I am embarassed to say out loud. husband and I are both huge supporters of our troups both overseas and at home. We are a very patriotic family. Now, it pisses me off that I have to show the same respect for SS. I know that him joining the Army has absolutely nothing at all to do with patriotism or protecting our Country. It has to do with "one upping" his father (which will never happen). I cannot stand the fact that he is now representing our Country, much less the fact that he is going to be trained with weapons. I know it's petty. And I know that it is really shallow. But, I can't help how I feel. He has put our family through so much He!!, and now I have to pretend to honor his pretend dedication to my Country. UGH! Sorry this is so rambling. I guess I just needed to vent.