Old college friend coming over Saturday

Discussion in 'The Watercooler' started by gcvmom, Aug 24, 2011.

  1. gcvmom

    gcvmom Here we go again!

    And I'm a wee bit anxious which I think is normal. I haven't seen this person since the week before I met husband, so that's about 23 years. He was a friend and sometimes roommate of my college sweetheart and we all hung out a lot together in those days. After graduation we went on a road trip to see my then-boyfriend (and the guy I thought I was going to marry) off on a cross-country peach march (long story), and a few years later (and several BFs later) I also visited him for a week up in the Bay area at his mom's house -- totally platonic, but we always had a lot of fun. He looked me up on FB a few months ago and turns out he lives in my region so I invited him over to meet the family. This should be an interesting evening! He's bringing Ethiopian food over for dinner. I think that's a nod to a restaurant we went to once up near UC Berkeley with a big group of people. I honestly don't remember much from that night, lol!

    Interestingly, I had posted something on this friend's FB page last week, and suddenly there's my exBF also posting a comment and then requesting to friend me. I haven't been in contact with exBF since my wedding (I invited him). I think there's still some unresolved emotions bouncing around in me, though nothing romantic whatsoever. Just things that didn't get said before moving on, mostly due to my inexperience and immaturity at the time. Which is unfortunate, because I ended up causing myself a lot of emotional harm as a result of not fully processing some things. And since this old friend is so closely associated with the exBF, I suppose you can see where my anxiety about meeting again comes from. I'm hoping I can use this as a way of exorcising some old ghosts and really moving on in my head to a better place.

    I'll let you know how it all goes, how the difficult children handle themselves (including husband), etc.
  2. keista

    keista New Member

    Sounds exciting!

    I went through similar emotions last year before heading back north to see "everyone" from the old days. Try to relax, and not have expectations - both positive and negative. I'm sure it will all work out great.
  3. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    I've found that once I see the person in person, there is absolutely nothing to say. So much has changed. After the butterflies wear off, reality hits--you've gone in different directions.
    Having said that, I think that meeting your family and bringing over Ethiopian food sounds great!
  4. hearts and roses

    hearts and roses Mind Reader

    Yep, that's usually what happens. I had allowed a lot of people from my HS days (which are a blur to me now) friend me on FB...after the initial "Hey, how's things going, wow you look great, etc." not much to say thereafter. In fact I even went back and defriended a few or just got them off my news feed.

    on the other hand, perhaps because you did have a very fulfilling rich friendship with this person, yours will be a better experience! At least you'll be eating yummy food!!
  5. gcvmom

    gcvmom Here we go again!

    Thanks, I'm trying to relax about the whole thing. I think if this were my ex I'd be more nervous. But this guy was like a goofy brother, a bit socially awkward, very smart and a quirky sense of humor. And he ALWAYS has something to talk about and loves to tell stories and hear them as well. So I have a feeling it will be a fun evening of catching up.
  6. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    He sounds relaxed and easy to get along with at any rate! Saturday will be here b4 you know it.