You all have been so helpful and supportive. Not knowing any of you (yet) I feel awkward in replying but then when I don't I feel like I've neglected you in some way. I hope you don't think I'm a jerk, I'm just scared of saying the wrong thing. I worked as a medic for years and behavioral emergencies were a part of my job but you know, this is NOTHING like what I was trained to work with. They don't teach you how to work with your own. You can't be taught the anguish and heartache. And when you throw in the fact that they're still just a kid - well - I'm having a really hard time. I'm here a LOT. Lurking and reading. My heart breaks for each and every one of you. I too wish none of us had to be here, but like everyone else says, I'm glad we have a place to go. Thanks again for helping me and my family.