That helped!

Discussion in 'Parent Emeritus' started by PatriotsGirl, Feb 20, 2012.

  1. PatriotsGirl

    PatriotsGirl Guest

    So having difficult child's old room a guest room was not working for me. Everytime I passed by it I would look at it forlornly thinking what a beautiful bedroom it was and is being wasted....and how much she would have enjoyed it.

    She has been gone for good for over a year now and I decided enough was enough.

    So on Saturday I moved everything out into the garage and moved all of my office stuff in. It is now the home office that husband and I have been wanting and can I just say that I am so loving it!!! I am working up here now and have my desk right next to the window with the sun shining in. Perfect. :) I am no longer looking around at what used to be or what could have been. I am now looking around and so happy with my environment. Only thing missing is a corner desk for husband that we are going to shop for. It also really opened up my living room with my desk armoire no longer in there.

    It is exactly what I needed.

    Wish it took the pain away, but we all know nothing takes that away....nothing but them getting better anyway. :(
     
  2. keista

    keista New Member

    :hi5: It's a beautiful thing!
     
  3. Elsieshaye

    Elsieshaye Member

    That's wonderful, PG! It's important to make your home your own and shifting physical things around really helps counteract stuck-ness. Enjoy your new space!!
     
  4. DaisyFace

    DaisyFace Love me...Love me not

    Sounds good, PG!

    Enjoy your office...
     
  5. shellyd67

    shellyd67 Active Member

    :bravo:That sounds great PG ! Enjoy !
     
  6. AnnieO

    AnnieO Shooting from the Hip

    :bigsmile:

    I'm glad you did that. It can really help to have a new space!
     
  7. Nancy

    Nancy Well-Known Member Staff Member

    That's great, I'm very proud of you. This is now a room that you and husband can enjoy. You are an inspiration to me.

    Nancy
     
  8. Kathy813

    Kathy813 Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Good for you! We turned out difficult child's room into a home office, too. She refers to it as "the room that was formerly mine". easy child's room was turned into a guest room.

    I guess we made ourselves very clear. :rofl:

    ~Kathy
     
  9. rejectedmom

    rejectedmom New Member

    Glad you are putting the space to good use and that you are doing better. I turned my difficult child's rooom into my craft/sewing room. I too couldn't look at his room without getting sad.
     
  10. HaoZi

    HaoZi Guest

    I'm glad you finally claimed the space as your own. :)
     
  11. pinevalley

    pinevalley Member

    I have already been thinking about what I would like to use difficult child's room for when we can finally get him out of our house. I'm glad that you are making good use of that room Good news!
     
  12. toughlovin

    toughlovin Guest

    My sons room was much larger than my daughters room... and last summer she decided she wanted to take his room as her own. I thought wow this will be good for me because like you I always felt that terrible sadness any time I walked by. So we really cleaned out his room... found some stuff we didn't know about... and she really claimed it as her own. We bought paint and she fixed the walls... and painted it 3 different girly colors and decorated it. It is now totally her room and I love it... both because she did a great job but also because it is now hers and has a whole new set of associations. She loves it because it is hers... and it is much bigger and better to have her friends in etc.

    TL
     
  13. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    I have a 4 bedroom double-wide mobile home that has a room off the master bedroom for an office or what could have been the nursery had we had a baby when we bought it. Of course we had no baby so it was my computer room from the start. It isnt a big room. The door opens into my bedroom.

    I bought this house when we took my mom in when she had alzheimers and she had to come live with me. That gave me and Tony the master and oldest took one room and other two kids shared a room and my mom had a room. Eventually near the end before she went to a nursing home, we had to move her to the dining room so we could keep move of an eye on her and my other two kids got their own rooms.

    Over the years, the kids switched rooms around, why I dont know. Once one left, that left 3 rooms and 2 kids. Of course, the middle one's wife came down and lived here for a little while but then she was gone. We have had a few people in and out. Our oldest one time lived in one room then he went to go meet his father for a month or so and when he came back he moved into the room that our youngest and his girlfriend had been using but when they broke up, youngest's new girlfriend didnt want to stay in that one so they cleaned out the room we used for storage and stayed in that one...lol. Then they moved out and put most of their stuff in the room they had been staying in which turned it back into storage. They came back and used the room that was left and now that is the guest room once they left again. Actually I call that granddaughters room. It is mostly pink and has all the toys in it. But Buck is in it now. Ugh.

    Now I find out that oldests girlfriend is coming in 2 weeks to stay in his room.
     
    Last edited: Jul 8, 2013
  14. Star*

    Star* call 911........call 911

    Some time - just takes things from you! Some things just take time. I sit in Dudes & STevens room when I type to all of you - and it took over a year to do it. But now it brings me happy feelings.

    It's like I told my son - I cried when I painted over your walls.......but I can never paint over the memories, just make new ones. Maybe some day you and your family will come here and help with that.
     
  15. Signorina

    Signorina Guest

    I redecorated difficult child's room last week. In fact your post inspired me to haul out the steamer to get the wrinkles out of the new drapery. One final step...

    When he left, I looked around his room and told H - "I want this room empty and I want to buy new furniture and a PINK FLOWERED bedspread & drapery..."

    In fact, within an hour of him leaving, H and I boxed up the few things remaining in his room and packed it all out of site. Almost feverishly - wanted to get it done before the pcs came home from school.

    I didn't go so far as new furniture, but I did buy a new (not flowered :-( blue and white striped-budget won over floral) bedspread, drapery, a few "grown up" pictures for the walls and FLORAL lampshades (for some lamps re purposed from another room.) I steam cleaned the carpet and patched the nail holes in the walls.

    It's not his room anymore. Still smells like his cologne - he must have spilled it somewhere - but I hope that will fade. But it doesn't look like his room. And now I can't go in there and lay on his bed and try to "feel" his presence. I didn't want it to become an untouched shell of a room awaiting his return or hold on to memories of a boy who no longer exists. That's why I did it sooner than later. If he does come home at some point and see it - it's a message to him. Even more so, it's a message to me; he doesn't live here anymore. Fake it til you make it.

    PC17 asked me "why are you doing all this?" and I said "next year you'll be away at school and I thought you might occasionally want to bring friend home for the weekend. Now, they can stay in here..." and easy child SMILED :)

    I also told easy child that if he gets an off campus apartment in a few years, he can take the furniture for it.
     
  16. Star*

    Star* call 911........call 911

    Fake it until you make it - LOVE IT!!!!!!!!!! LOVE IT!!!!!!!!!! (borrows it) lol
     
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