dstc_99
Well-Known Member
difficult child has been here 39 days. Still not job and not much looking is being done on her part. She did get a job as a babysitter for a family but they conveniently have never called her with a start date. Her constant complaints about money are not acknowledged by me. She isn’t going without she just doesn’t have any extra money to do much with. On the other hand she did make $160 for babysitting over the last two weeks. People here seriously overpay for daycare. Where has that money gone?
Over the last two weeks difficult child has started taking my car out at night to visit friends. I don’t mind. It is after the time I would go anywhere and if an emergency should arise I have husband’s truck. On the other hand I do worry about her being out so late. One night she came home at 5am most of the other nights it has been around 1am. I spoke to her about her safety and the fact that driving so late at night/early in the morning is not such a good idea. I did not give her a curfew. She is 18 years old and not doing drugs or drinking so I don’t feel I should impose a curfew on her unless she is an issue.
husband had me text difficult child at midnight Saturday and ask her to come home. We were planning to go out as a family Sunday and he wanted her to get enough sleep so she wouldn’t be evil. difficult child was not happy. She sent me a text saying “Jesus, OK” and then came home. The next morning she was not a happy camper and proceeded to take it out us. She felt husband was imposing a curfew on her and blew up. I had to sit husband down separately and discuss not engaging during the anger. After about 30 minutes to cool off I set them both down and had a conversation with them without playing into her game. Basically he was imposing a curfew without my knowledge and I had told her there was no curfew. Top that off with them not communicating with each other or me and “yippee let the fun begin.”
The outcome was after about a hour we all went out and had a good day. I just wanted to say thank you to you guys for teaching me how to disengage and work stuff out so that my husband and I are happy with the outcome. difficult child’s threats of leaving didn’t even faze me. Her smart aleck comments and texts got non committal responses and actions from me. I made no commitments and I didn’t buy into the drama. So thanks once again for the support and the training to help me disconnect and make decisions that work for us and not just for difficult child.
Over the last two weeks difficult child has started taking my car out at night to visit friends. I don’t mind. It is after the time I would go anywhere and if an emergency should arise I have husband’s truck. On the other hand I do worry about her being out so late. One night she came home at 5am most of the other nights it has been around 1am. I spoke to her about her safety and the fact that driving so late at night/early in the morning is not such a good idea. I did not give her a curfew. She is 18 years old and not doing drugs or drinking so I don’t feel I should impose a curfew on her unless she is an issue.
husband had me text difficult child at midnight Saturday and ask her to come home. We were planning to go out as a family Sunday and he wanted her to get enough sleep so she wouldn’t be evil. difficult child was not happy. She sent me a text saying “Jesus, OK” and then came home. The next morning she was not a happy camper and proceeded to take it out us. She felt husband was imposing a curfew on her and blew up. I had to sit husband down separately and discuss not engaging during the anger. After about 30 minutes to cool off I set them both down and had a conversation with them without playing into her game. Basically he was imposing a curfew without my knowledge and I had told her there was no curfew. Top that off with them not communicating with each other or me and “yippee let the fun begin.”
The outcome was after about a hour we all went out and had a good day. I just wanted to say thank you to you guys for teaching me how to disengage and work stuff out so that my husband and I are happy with the outcome. difficult child’s threats of leaving didn’t even faze me. Her smart aleck comments and texts got non committal responses and actions from me. I made no commitments and I didn’t buy into the drama. So thanks once again for the support and the training to help me disconnect and make decisions that work for us and not just for difficult child.