BusynMember
Well-Known Member
It is my suggestion to answer only one out of ten calls from him and then limit it. You two can not handle him anymore. Nor should you have to. He is NOT the fun, joking young person you remember. He is a middle age man still looking for a daddy and mommy to bail him out of life. If he kills you, then what? If you have money he will inherit, guess what? It will be gone in six months. Then what will he do without a mommy and daddy? It's time he learns now.
Your poor health may be partly due to your mentally abusive son. Do you and your husband have a death wish? My suggestion, which you don't have to take, is to go very low contact with this son. Enough is enough. You gave him everything, including your best years and your health. It's time for him to start giving back to you as most normal adult children do when their parents age. If he is so selfish as to keep heaping this sort of pressure on his father and yourself, there is truly no hope for him. He needs, in my opinion, to learn that he is not the only person on earth and that is the best way he can survive after you are gone. If he uses drugs, well, you can't stop him and if he doesn't want to stop, even a rehab won't help him. It's that simple.
Big huggs...hoping you can make those good, hard choices that better your own lives
Your poor health may be partly due to your mentally abusive son. Do you and your husband have a death wish? My suggestion, which you don't have to take, is to go very low contact with this son. Enough is enough. You gave him everything, including your best years and your health. It's time for him to start giving back to you as most normal adult children do when their parents age. If he is so selfish as to keep heaping this sort of pressure on his father and yourself, there is truly no hope for him. He needs, in my opinion, to learn that he is not the only person on earth and that is the best way he can survive after you are gone. If he uses drugs, well, you can't stop him and if he doesn't want to stop, even a rehab won't help him. It's that simple.
Big huggs...hoping you can make those good, hard choices that better your own lives
