I have a 17 year old son who is months from being 18. He is smart, sweet, big hearted, beautiful with long blonde curly hair and funny. He works hard at his dishwasher job. I love spending time with him when he is in a good mood. We just found out that he is also ADHD, ODD and depressed. He was diagnosed as Bipolar and ADHD at 6 years old. Yes 6. An age not usual for a bi-polar diagnosis and for good reason because it turned out he was misdiagnosed. However, he kept that misdiagnosis for 10 years! The mistake was realized and his diagnosis changed to ODD at 16 (which apparently they had suspected the whole time and several counselors - he has had over a dozen- diagnosed but we were never told). Even then we were not told of the change in diagnosis and I only found out 2 months ago. He is almost 18. I immediately jumped into research and realized, among the fact that his ODD was probably caused by my bad parenting, that we had been going about his treatment all wrong...for 11 years! I should have had parenting classes. We should have had family therapy. There should have been less focus on medication. There is so much wrong with what we have done for the last 11 years. I spent all my time reading about bi-polar disorder, treatments, how to parent and ways to cope. I have my own emotional problems which already made me not the greatest parent and to add to it I was trying all the wrong things. We put him on every medication imaginable and nothing ever made a difference. Now we know why. However, now I have a violent, out of control almost adult and I don't have a clue how to help him. He does horrible in school, He is 2 months from graduation and retaking the same 3 classes he failed last semester which are all he needs to graduate and he is failing them again. Not for lack of intelligence, from refusal to do the work and skipping. He breaks laws with his drivers license (example drives after 10 when he legally isn't supposed to) and has no respect for authority...any authority. He doesn't listen to a word I say. Never has honestly and ever since he got bigger than me he gets in my face, refuses to let me leave, follows me around and sometimes hits or breaks things when he is angry at a consequence or not getting his way. It has gotten so bad he moved in with his friend down the street. He has been running the streets doing whatever he wants since he left. My heart is breaking. I don't know what to do. I see so much potential in him, but how can I help an almost 18 year old learn to listen to authority, follow rules, accept consequences, especially when he is bigger than me and not living at home? How can I help him to become less angry and more accepting when he hates me? This isn't something he just says either. He hates me, we have tried to explore it in counseling. He says he does not know why but I think it is one reason he is so out of control and also why he treats girls like crap. They are nothing but sex objects to him...or at least that's how he treats most of them. I have seen him get emotionally attached and his heart broken a couple of times. He is so angry and hateful. He just can't accept something he doesn't like...consequence, an answer or otherwise. I am afraid I am going to get a call that he is in prison someday, which is where his father is. Anyway, I know it's a lot to say and actually doesn't really tell enough, but has anyone here been in a similar situation? Does anyone have any advice?