An Ant update


Active Member
we never heard from any police. my older son who is a cop looked into the computer and said there are no charges there for ant. so...who knows if the arresting cop is out of town or what? I do not think this will go away.

meanwhile he is very anxious and fearful. he was drinking beer nightly but the other night asked to go see the doctor and get some prescription for anxiety. I had suggested this for him before and he wouldnt go. he is ready. we have an appointment tomorrow midday to see the doctor.

he still is going to work and paid this month's rent. yesterday he made himself a meatloaf and he has been staying alone and not bringing women around. it is a waiting time.

hearts and roses

Mind Reader

It sounds like he's been scared so badly, he's actually thinking healthier. Good for him to ask for help and stand independently. And good for you for not freaking out. Hugs & prayers being sent your way.
A blessing in disguise that it is taking so long for the system to catch up with him. He was ready to do something rash if he were to get picked up a few weeks ago, am I right? Now it almost seems like he is planning for it.

I am very glad you got to get away for awhile too. You certainly deserved it.


Active Member
thanks, I did stop at Giant Eagle and asked if they have any anti-anxiety medications on their $4.00 prescription list. ant has no health ins. the pharmacist said to ask the doctor for buspar. so I will see if he agrees and will RX that for ant.

ant was suicidal but no longer. he seems resigned to accept whatever comes his way.

the trip was a wonderful respite. took me two days to turn to rubber and relax.


Well-Known Member
Janet, I am sure you reminded Ant that he has had many of these scares and can not afford to need a scare to get on the right path. He does seem to think more appropriately when he is in trouble. He has 'too little, too late' syndrome. But, he can recognize that pattern and change it. Perhaps a weekly reminder letter in the mail to stay on the right path is all it would take. Maybe a saying framed on the wall of the bathroom that he is forced to read daily while sitting on the throne. Not making a joke, just trying to think of the best way to get the reminder without getting into trouble.


No real answers to life..
Hoping he can remain alcohol free until they catch up to him, would be good if he would be clean until that time....medications would be good to calm him.....hope they help.....


No real answers to life..
Just curious and not looking for him to get out of this, but don't they have to charge him within a certain time? I thought like 30 days they had to notify him of something....right to a speedy trial and all that....I know it hasn't been that long, but just wondered....

saving grace

New Member
Janet thanks for the update, glad to hear you had a nice time away. Also glad to hear that Ant is calming down a bit with the drinking and women. My difficult child is also taking Buspar, just started it so I dont know how its working for him yet but I had been on it for quite a while in the past and it works fine. Its not very strong or addictive. It sort of just takes the edge off but he has to take it everyday for the full effect. Good Luck tomorrow



Active Member
Hi Janet,
how are you holding up?

Can't figure out what is going on with the legal system. I think I would need anti anxiety medication. if I were Ant. It's got to be very stressful waiting for the cops to come and get him.

If it's not in the computer, is there a chance it was dropped and forgot about???


Active Member
I cant figure it out. ant had me over for dinner tonight and we talked a long time. I hope the medications help and that the doctor will RX something. I dont know if they have to do it in a certain amount of time. I dont want to


Warrior Parent
My guess is the report is sitting in a file in a drawer somewhere, waiting for a signature or a date or something insignificant.

When my difficult child got arrested for selling pot at his school, it took another 8 months for charges to be filed. He was arrested in March, and we didn't have a Merry Christmas that year. His court date was set for the following February. I remember clearly, it was on my mom's birthday.

The hits just keep on coming.

Sorry for the waiting game. Would be nice if ant could use the time to make his past mean something different. My difficult child never could do this, always figured he was screwed anyway, so why even bother.



Active Member
so ant went to the doctor he had since he was a teen. the doctor talked to us for a long time. he knows all about the real ant. he put ant on klonipin and trazadone. he said those are cheap medications and the jails RX both so it would be good to do those. ant had been on both of those while in jail. the trazadone is to sleep and the klonipin for anxiety. ant was relieved it seems to talk to the guy.

to take both it cost just under $2.00 A DAY. It is up to him to take them properly.