Does anyone use behavior charts and if so do they work.cause i was going to start one monday an idea from the theripist but i want to make it big and something difficult child will think is fun.any suggestions would be helpful thank you.
I approached my difficult child's counselor for alternative ideas in place of those charts because our difficult child is 12 and she already complains that we treat her like a little kid. I figured that something like that would only make it worse. So, I simply asked if there was another technique that had basically the same concept, and she referred me to a book....
"How to make your children mind without losing yours" and it is based on the "reality discipline" concept. It focuses on "encouragement and natural consequences" techniques instead of the normal and common "rewards and punishment" techniques. I was a little leary of such things as I began reading the book, but the farther I have dove into it, the more the things in it make sense. And it can even be used on younger kids as well...
This is not a book that is SPECIALLY centered around handling particularly difficult children, but the things he says could certainly be applied to our difficult child's and some of the things he mentions trying seem like they would really work to get our difficult child to do the things that are expected of her WITHOUT making her explode at every little request. And the neat thing that I like most about it is that it works for all kids, so you aren't trying to use several different techniques for your children depending on which one you are dealing with at the moment. Not only does this save your sanity because you aren't trying to keep track of who's method is who's, but also because if all the children in your house are are being managed equally and using the same system, there will not be as many issues with "not fair" that one child gets something the other doesnt, or that you are more strict on one child than the other. A child's perception is their reality, and if they perceive that they are not being treated the same as their sibling, beit the easy child or the difficult child, there will be complications surrounding that difference. This method seems to bring together all types of children to be raised in equal expectations, rules, and responsibilities.
Give it a shot, can't hurt anything and if you don't agree with it, then pretend you never seen it, and try to forget that I am the one that suggested it... I would rather not be responsible for sending you on a wild goose chase, but...I figure there is a chance it will work for you, after time, so I figure it has to be worth a shot. :smile: Huges!!!!
In my classroom I have tried all kinds of behavior charts and finaly found something that works. My kids like checklists of everything they have to do for the day and they cross out stuff as we accomplish it. They also earn peices of a sunshine for getting caught making good choices. If they have earned all 15 parts of their sunshine they earn 15 additional minutes outside at the end of the day. My kids freak out when they loose things so I try to keep my behavior plans positive. I would try having your child earn pieces to something. One teacher I know uses a gumball machine and kids get to color in gumballs. I chose sunshines because I have a little one that loves weather. So I would suggest picking something preferrd. I live on the coast. One middle school teacher uses pieces to a surfboard with her students. Good luck.
I used behavior charts for almost 3 years in conjunction with some other behavior modification techniques.
They worked so miraculously here that we actually went from having Dylan with an ODD diagnosis to having it removed from his Axis because he didn't any longer fit the criteria (and we medicated his Bipolar properly).
It took alot of work, alot of time, and it didn't work in a week. It was a very slow process and weaning off was a very slow process, but years later, and he's only 10, I don't need a chart for anything. He does ALL by himself, without having to be told twice or getting any reward.
I would post more info here but it would be a book. If I can help in any way, please PM me.
thanks for answeing.now dont laugh i did watch super nanny last weekend an ddid see a few things that i will try.im going to use a house on paper and make it big and fun.he has to get so many checks in it to get something special.but everytine he does some thing wrong he will lose a check.i am going to do it for my other son as well even though i dont have as many promblems with him i thought if difficult child sees his chart it might help him to do better.i dont expect it to work right away but i will give it time ill let every one know how it did.