Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by Jena, Oct 16, 2010.

  1. Jena

    Jena New Member

    remember earlier today difficult child raging with her shake, punching herself the bed whatever she could get a hold of? i let her go and freak out, didnt' try to stop it. waited till it was over. threw remaining shake in cup and got her outta here to go see secretariat movie she was dying to see. dr. okd it yesterday, it's right down road. i knew she needed a change of scenery. she finished remaining shake there in p lot.

    difficult child relates super well to horses. so long story short we are watching movie i tell her hey its' a true story. we talked about the horses strength, resiliency even when he was sick, how he never gave up his determination and most of all his heart. i said your alot like him. she laughed thought it was funny. she actually said but i'm not eating. i said are you kidding me your trying soo hard with-those shakes each day. you have come a long way since the hospital only 4 short days ago.

    we left and came home. long story short i felt she was ready for it. i dont' know why, maybe the rage, maybe the movie, I don't know. i made her a scrambled egg and a piece of toast. i was making it, she smelled it and said wow that actually smells good. ididnt' make a big deal about it. i had her set the table nice with-candles etc. for us.

    Ok. SHE IS EATING IT RIGHT NOW!!! sitting there crying happy tears, granted she did hold it in her mouth for her while, and is working on swallowing it but i can hear her self talking herself thru it.

    this is a huge huge start. i told her if you can pick one food a day that you love i'll make it for you than the other two meals we'll do shakes.

    i had to share this since all of you have been on this journey the past few mos with me. now i'm making her a bubble bath and using some cetaphil because the hospital bed rest lock down ruined her skin it's all dry and has sores.

    it's so stupid isnt' it how something that you are accustomed to than goes away and it comes back and can just place you in such a happy place. stupid hospital just needed to back up and listen to what i was telling them. stupid doctors
  2. HaoZi

    HaoZi Guest

    I cannot express how happy I am for you both, and yes I have learned the joy of seeing my own back off from the edge and start making progress. :D
  3. Jena

    Jena New Member

    yea i went in bathroom and cried after she looked at me and said mom thank you, i just needed someone to help me and you did. OMG i almost broke down. been long 3 mos.

    it's a start I don't know what tmrw will bring, yet one meal a day of solids is an amazing start. should call princeton and tell them let me in with the movie secretariat and some shakes and we'll get them eating LOL. alot to be said for movies that inspire
  4. smallworld

    smallworld Moderator

  5. Jena

    Jena New Member

    you know without our calls and everyone here i couldnt' of stayed sane through the past several mos
  6. Wiped Out

    Wiped Out Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Great news!:)
  7. svengandhi

    svengandhi Well-Known Member

    I am SO happy to hear that your little girl is eating something. Your idea of offering her one light meal of something she loves each day is terrific and is hopefully what she needs to get her past this. Each time something goes down her throat and does not choke her is another step closer to conquering her fear.

    Maybe you can tell her that she can go Horseability or one of the other programs they have when she's eaten enough to be strong enough to do it? My daughter and her friend went to volunteer with the program near me. It didn't work out - my daughter was afraid of the horses and her friend was afraid of the kids! However, I know people who love the program and if she already loves horses, it seems like a great fit.

    I hope to read that she ate another meal tomorrow.
  8. Jena

    Jena New Member

    hi. yea we already had planned riding lessons from while back than she got sick. so we're checking with-dr. on monday how much time and try to set goal as far as when to make appointment for. yes hopefully tmrw will go well and this is the beginning. long day i'm heading to bed....... :)
  9. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Well, Auntie Janet loves loves loves homemade tapioca pudding...maybe she would too. I will give you my magic recipe if she would like to try it.
  10. KTMom91

    KTMom91 Well-Known Member

    What great news!
  11. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    this is AWESOME!!!!! I am proud of you both. can only type 1 hand because back problem, but couldn't let this pass! Way To Go!!!!!
  12. Fran

    Fran Former desparate mom

    Great news. I'll be watching for updates. :bigsmile:

    I saw the movie yesterday too. Incredibly uplifting with good lessons about running your own course and not someone else's. Add a little love, devotion and belief in something and you see excellence happen. I love that it is based on a true story and I can remember when it happened.
  13. Mamaof5

    Mamaof5 Guest

    Have you considered trying a few martial art techniques with her like conscious breathing? It's very calming for a meditation and after practicing it for some time it becomes a very natural response to anxiety. It also retrains people to breath the way were we built to breath (belly breathing is the natural way for humans to breath but we've forgotten that and chest breath leaving us with less O2 in the system). Just thought I'd throw that out there for an idea.
  14. Andy

    Andy Active Member

    Good Job to both of you!!! Your persistance and Warrior Mom stance paid off. I hope things continue to go well.
  15. Bunny

    Bunny Guest

    That is the BEST news! I was wondering how you guys were doing. I hope that today goes well, too. You sound like you are doing your best to put her at ease and that seems to be exactly what she needs right now. You are an awesome mother!! Keep up the good work!

  16. Jena

    Jena New Member

    thanks guys. she's an awesome kid, it's all her. and secretariat! :)

    today she wants pancakes for breakfast?? :) we'll c.

    dr. ok'd pumpkin picking also :) her energy is slowly returning. i bet she gained at least 1 or 2 lbs. these past 5 days getting out of that horrid hospital.

    Fran alot to be said for movies. they make you feel stuff. i cried. tonight i'm renting black stallion after our pumpkin picking.
  17. Jena

    Jena New Member

    Janet great idea, yet she can't handle the texture of that. the lumps and stuff. i'm kinda letting her guide me thru this at this point with-the solids. she'll know when she's ready. she's a smart girl. rage did pay off
  18. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    I'm late checking in, hoping for an update first, but this news is great! Maybe she could learn some relaxation exercises just before eating or even during in case she starts to panic.
    Good job!!!!!
  19. Jena

    Jena New Member

    that's what i've been doing with-her since beginning as soon as i got her out of that hospital. relaxation breathing, visualizing stuff, imagery. luckily my old job paid off i remembered part of my training classes :)

    she couldn't handle the pancakes today, she got one down though a small one. she's very eager, yet i reminded her you want to set yourself up for success not failure. i said there is no shame in taking it very slow and i for one will not pressure you at all. She than suggested making lunch a solid because her throat in the a.m. is rough. So she problem solved which is good also. So, she had her hot chocolate, apple juice, one pancake and is very excited about getting a pumpkin today.

    we won't be trying anymore solids today. tmrw is a new day. she had a real hard time with-the pancake. she held it in her mouth for sooo long and wound up spitting out a few bites. yet did complete one. so she made her calories for the a.m. for lunch i'm doing a mcdonalds shake that's 500 calories right there.

    i told her one day at a time, and take it real slow.
  20. Jena

    Jena New Member

    big mistake. dr okp pumpkin picking i check with-him first due to weight etc. i tell her ok we'll get mcdonalds shake. you have to drink on the way. we get lost bc husband gives wrong directoins and losing an hr in my world rightnow isn't good. i have dirty laundry piled up a dirty house no food in it because i can't find time to do anything but feed her. we slipped in movie yesterday because she needed fun. so now she wont' drink shake. we returned home to mapquest again.

    this is def giong to be an up and down thing each day and i'll drive you all nuts if i update daily cause i'm driving myself nuts at this point. easy child seems to be calming thank goodness yet husband isnt' we haven't talked in days literally.